Of Bandits and Friends

“Oh, Muuuuscles~!”

Jiang opened up one eye, far too tired to get up from the bench he napped on. Yijun loomed over him like a cat ready to strike, her lip curled up in a mischievous smirk. He thought the entire village would have a little more sense than to just walk up and loom over him while he’s sleeping, but it looked like Yijun took that sense and dumped it in the nearest well before coming here to bug him.

“Bug off, Yijun,” he said sleepy before closing his eye again. “I need sleep.”

Even if he couldn’t see her, he could imagine her eyes fluttering as she said, “Awww, but it’s for another favor, something so important! Come on, can’t you do your bestie a solid?!”

“If we were actually besties, you’d actually let me sleep.”

“If you had a lick of sense, you’d be sleeping in your own room!”

He opened his eyes just to glare daggers at Yijun as he growled, “You think that would have stopped you from bothering me?”

Yijun looked away from him, placing a finger on her chin. “Hmmmm…” After a moment, she turned back to him and said, “Yeah, good point! Though, why ARE you sleeping out here?”

 Jiang yawned before turning onto his side and staring at a nearby tree. “I’ve been sleeping like garbage, so I wanted to see if sleeping outside helped any.”

Yijun’s eyes widened, her hands flying to her mouth. “Oh, so THAT’S why it was so quiet last night!” she said. “Lately, all I’ve been hearing are those usual drunkards acting up late at night, so it was disturbing my beauty sleep! I told dad to take care of it, but drunkards are on the bottom of his priority list.” Yijun flicked back her long strands of brown hair and huffed, crossing her arms as she said, “Should have been at the top, honestly. What kind of chieftain is he, letting those hooligans run about and disturb his daughter’s precious beauty sleep?”

He turned towards Yijun now with an eyebrow quirked. “Did you tell him what they looked like?”

The girl turned white as a sheet, a look of horror spreading across her face. “I… I don’t think I did,” she admitted. “I was far too sleepy! How was I supposed to remember?”

A large sigh escaped his lips as Jiang replied, “Well, there’s your problem.” Finding that there wasn’t any possible way for Yijun to leave him alone, he sat up and stretched, taking a few moments to rub the sleep out of his eyes. “Anyway, they were causing shit a few nights ago, so I taught ‘em a lesson or two. If they were the same guys, then it’s no surprise that they decided to shut up the moment they saw me.”

“Oooh, your brutality actually came in handy, for once!” Yijun said cheerfully as she clasped her hands together. “Could you keep sleeping on a bench? Please? You’d be doing me a huuuuge favor!”

“If I do that, will you call off your stupid rainbow fish favor?”

“Mmmm, lemme think about that…” For a second, her smirk was replace with a pensive look. Just for a second. “Nope!”

Jiang rolled his eyes, slouching and holding his chin in his hand as he replied, “Yeah, figured I wouldn’t get off that easy.”

“Hey, a girl’s gotta look her best, and what better way to stand out at a party than to have rainbow fish scales sewn into your dress! Or make a necklace out of them!” Yijun held her cheeks in her hands, a dreamy expression on her face as she twirled in place. “Oh, I’d be the star of Lady Zheng’s ball for sure! Men would be begging for my hand in marriage! Women would be smoldering with envy! Nobles would demand the secret to my beauty and give me so much gold to attain perfection! Oho! Ohoho! OHOHOHOHO!”

Her laugh was loud enough to echo through the town, attracting some confused stares from the townspeople. Jiang, for his part, simply stared at her with a bored look on his face. When that obviously wasn’t enough to stop her mad cackling, he said, “Well, good to know that you’re still batshit crazy. So, about that other favor you were going to bug me about…”

That certainly got him a nasty glare, but as long as everyone else stopped looking in their direction, it didn’t matter. After a few moments, the glare was replaced with a more serious look. “It’s not so much a favor as it is a call for help,” she said, catching Jiang’s full attention. “I’ve heard lots of things from dad about bandits. It hasn’t bothered us, since none of them seem to target our caravans. Lord Zheng’s certainly pissed that his own caravan got raided a few weeks ago, sending out a lot more patrols on the trade routes.”

Unease washed over Jiang, though he made sure it didn’t show on the outside. So he was right to lay low: the patrols would make things too much of a hassle for small group of bandits. If they managed to get a good look at them, they could report it to their Lord… and their faces would be plastered over bounty boards across the area.

“But,” Yijun continued, “That didn’t deter the bandits for long. Just the other day, we got a report from Dongzhu Village. Bandits struck and struck hard, pillaging everything they had to offer and then some.” Her expression darkened, her hand balling into a fist. “They killed everyone that fought back: men, women, children… didn’t matter. They all died the same. The messenger was lucky to be alive, nevermind come to us with this news. All they have are a handful of survivors, all of them incapable of caring for themselves.”

Jiang quivered, his blood boiling in his veins. Robbing innocent people of their goods was horrible enough, but robbing them of their lives, too? Absolutely barbaric. Clearly, Yijun picked up on his hidden rage, looking him right in the eye as she said, “I know, it’s awful. That poor man lost an arm and an eye, running so much to even get the news out to us. He said that we might be the next target: we’re close and relatively prosperous for a backwater town.”

He stood up, a fire lit in his heart, an angry spark in his eyes. “As if I’d let them,” he growled as he cracked his knuckles. “You’re gonna need to give a signal when they strike, just in case I’m too busy hunting your stupid fish to be at home.”

“Well, yeah, of course,” Yijun replied nervously, pressing her fingers together and looking away from Jiang. “I’ll send up a plume of red smoke: heavens know I need to practice a little magic, especially if I want to be of any help. You won’t be the only one fighting, buuut if we’re being honest, you’d probably be the only fighter we need. You roughed up some drunkards and punched people out for dumber reasons, so imagine how much of a beating you’ll give ‘em when they’re threatening your home!”

“Beating’s an understatement and you know it.”

“My goodness, you’re right!” Yijun’s hand flew to her mouth again, eyes wide with shock for a second before she smirked. “I’m sorry, Jiang, I meant to say ‘outright slaughter’. “

“That’s better,” Jiang replied with a devious smile, before he turned away to yawn. “Might want to start forming some sorta strategy, maybe set up a few traps to bring their numbers down. While ya do that, I’m gonna start another day of finding your stupid rainbow fish.”

“Yes, yes, you do that! Hopefully you reel it in today~! That’d be so, so sweet of you, Musclehead~!”

Jiang rolled his eyes as he headed back home to get his fishing rod and bait. There was still a bit of unease, but if Yijun kept to her word about the flare, everything would be okay… right?

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“Hey, Kailani! I’m back!”

It took a moment for the mermaid to poke her head out and see him not just with the usual fishing rod and bait, but also with another basket of goods. She dove back down, the ruffian quirking an eyebrow before she did one large flip onto land, right in front of the goods. She ripped off the blanket covering the basket, revealing the many, many meat buns prepared especially for her.

She stared Jiang right in the eye, bowed, and then said, “You are the best.”

Then the devouring began.

Jiang couldn’t help but laugh. Oh, he made sure to bring something nice for her to eat these days, as he took more time out of his day just to see her. It was fun seeing her come up with more tricks to show off before she cleaned house. Maybe it was a little shocking to see her eat so much at first, but by now, Jiang simply appreciated that someone else had a hearty appetite. It meant that nothing was going to waste… and gave him an excuse to cook more often.

After the third meat bun, Kailani flopped like a contented, fat fish and said, “Man, this is your best meal yet! I’m already feelin’ stuffed!” She rolled over to his side as he cast his line and sat down, smiling like a doofus. “Where’d you learn to cook this, anyway?” she asked. “Did you have to climb a mountain and talk to an ancient chef?”

Jiang chuckled, grinning ear to ear as he replied, “Well, if I did, that’d be one helluva story to tell! But nah, I just learned from my aunt.” His eyes met Kailani’s, her expression beckoning him to tell her more. Or maybe he was just amazed by how stunningly blue they were? “I kinda asked her to teach me, since her food’s way better than mine when she actually cooks.” He looked towards the horizon now, his smile mirroring his aunt’s as he continued, “The best memories I have are all those times I cooked beside her for New Year’s Eve, stuffing meat buns, chopping up vegetables, and helping make stock for her beef stew.”

“Aw, that’s so sweet!” Kailani said as she sat up beside him, wriggling the fins on the sides of her head happily. “Maybe you could bring some of her meat buns, too! You know, so I can compare them!”

“That’s a funny way of saying ‘please give me twice as many meat buns.’” Kailani looked away from him and whistled innocently. Good. It meant that it was harder for her to notice his frown. “Though, you’re gonna need to wait. She doesn’t really cook as often anymore. Maybe on New Year’s, but…”

Unfortunately for him, Kailani did notice, frowning along with him. “Did… did something happen?” she asked. “Or did she lose the passion?”

Jiang averted his eyes, thinking back on how Aunt Chun’s hands trembled while holding a spoon, how exhausted she got just from heading to the markets alone, how much time she spent sleeping the day away... He was quiet for a little bit before he forced himself to look Kailani in the eye and say, “I wouldn’t say that… that something happened all of a sudden. And she didn’t lose her passion for it, either.” Swallowing hard, he continued, “It’s… well, she was always… uh, sick.” He paused, expecting Kailani to interrupt him, but she simply nodded her head, folding her hands over her lap and listening intently to him. “I don’t mean violently sick, like she caught the plague or anything. It’s more, uhm… subtle, more… invisible, I guess? No one would notice unless they basically lived with her, basically. And for a while, I didn’t really notice, either, until I moved in with her.”

Kailani nodded again, urging Jiang to continue. Still, he had to take another deep breath, trying not to worry too much about his aunt at this moment. “She’s basically weak. She’s tired all the time, and she struggles with stuff. It really makes it hard for her to do much of anything most days, so she just… sleeps a lot. She tries hiding it and pretending that she’s alright, which works for most people, but… it stops her from cooking anything without help these days. The only thing she can cook without help is stew, and most of that is just watching over it.” Quietly, he added, “To make matters worse, nobody actually knows how to cure it, so it’s just… something she has to suffer through.”

Finally, he clammed up, unsure whether he said too little or said too much. Kailani tilted her head, puzzled, but when it was apparent that he had nothing more to say, she smiled at him and said, “She really is blessed, having a nephew like you with her.”

Jiang snorted. “Most would say she’s cursed to have someone like me with her.”

“I don’t see why,” Kailani said as she crossed her arms. “You keep her company and cook for her and I’m pretty sure you help her out a lot with chores!”

“Well… you’re not wrong.” Jiang looked away from her again, placing a hand on his neck. “But let’s just say that I’ve done a few things that the townspeople aren’t…exactly happy about.”

“Sorry, Jiang. I’m having a hard time thinking of anything you could do that would upset other people.”

Oh dear. Poor Kailani was about to get her hopes and dreams shattered. Jiang didn’t want to break her illusion of him being fantastic, but… he had to be honest, at least with her. “When I actually started staying in town,” he said, making sure not to look at Kailani directly, “I tried to make friends with a few kids in town. Tried my best to fit in, but they kept making me the butt of jokes and made me have to carry all their stuff around. I thought I had to bear with it, but the last straw was when they ditched me in a bamboo forest not too far from here, tricking me into thinking we were playing Hide and Seek.” Jiang took a deep breath and sighed as he added, “Next time I saw the leader, I broke his nose and gave him two black eyes.”

That gasp that escaped Kailani’s lips was all he needed to hear for him to feel like a giant piece of shit. Now even she knew that he wasn’t really a great person… and that’s without saying a thing about his little side job.

After a long period of awkward silence and Jiang pulling up yet another trout, Kailani finally spoke up and said, “I… kinda understand where you were coming from. We both know what you did was wrong, but if… if those were my ‘friends’ and they kept acting like a jerk to me, I’d probably punch them, too. Or feel tempted to, at least.” Jiang brought himself to look at her, though he looked more shocked than anything. “That doesn’t mean you’re not a good person at heart, though. Maybe a little rough and hard to deal with for some people, but you’re still nice at your core. You’re nice to your aunt and nice to me, and I bet you have more friends that you’re nice to, too!”

“Ah, um, well,” Jiang stammered, his cheeks burning with embarrassment. “Well, yeah, I do have two other friends. Weird to most people, since one’s a Rokurokubi and the other’s a Chimera. They’re nicer than they look, once you get to know ‘em.”

Kailani smiled brightly as she clasped her hands together and said, “See? You have other people who must be blessed to call you a friend! It’s just more proof that you’re a nice person: nice people make friends a lot easier than people who aren’t!” Her smile seemed so sad, however, when she looked away from him and added, “I’m kinda jealous. You have a lot more friends than I do, you know. And I’m sure they like you a lot.”

Most of the time, it was better to think before you said anything. Jiang, on the other hand, forgot all about thinking as he stood up and blurted out, “Hey, don’t say things like that! You have a friend who likes you a lot right here, you know!” Thinking came after, and then regret. Quickly, he added, “W-well, that and I could introduce you to my other friends! I’m sure you guys’ll get along fine!”

Kailani stared at him, dumbfounded, before her bright smile returned, complete with twinkling eyes. “Really!? I’d love to meet them, if it isn’t a problem!”

“Might take a bit to set up, but we’ll make it happen,” Jiang replied with a smile, though he was trying his best not to think too hard about what he said. “I promise, you won’t have to wait long, okay?”

“I’ll wait however long it takes, so don’t worry. I have all the time in the world, anyway!”

Time marched on, the basket looking rather empty as Kailani slowly, but surely, cleared it of meat buns. Jiang still didn’t find a single rainbow fish, but again, it didn’t matter. He was more occupied with watching Kailani do tricks underwater and hum again, cheerful as could be. Before he knew it, the sun had set, and his bucket was once again overflowing with fish he was sure he wasn’t able to eat in one sitting.

As he prepared to head back home, Kailani called out, “Hey, Jiang?”

He turned towards her with a small smile. “What’s up, Kailani?”

Kailani twiddled her thumbs for a bit before she asked, “Um, is there a river that flows through your town or anything?”

“Only one, and that’s Shufen River on the eastern side of town.” Jiang couldn’t help but quirk an eyebrow as he asked, “Why? Have any plans?”

“Oh, great!” Kailani face lit up, her fins wriggling happily. “I thought that since you took a lot of effort to see me, I should make an effort to go and visit you! Besides, I’d like to see your home for myself!”

Jiang’s heart leaped with joy in his chest, though it was a little dampened by the current situation. After giving it a bit of thought, he said, “I appreciate it, but it might not be safe. We’ve heard things about a possible bandit attack, and I’d hate for you to get caught up in it. Maybe when all that trouble has passed, though.”

He certainly did not expect that sudden look of determination on Kailani’s face. “Bandit troubles?” she asked. “Then all the more reason I should visit! I want to help protect your home and the people you care for!”

Part of him thought that was too dangerous. She’s too nice to get caught up in a skirmish. On the other hand, being a mystical fish lady, she must have some powers that could help out. Kailani didn’t strike him as the type to suddenly get confident if she couldn’t do anything, anyway. “Doesn’t sound like I could really stop you even if I wanted to,” Jiang said with a small chuckle. “Just… be careful, alright?”

“Of course!” As he turned to leave, Kailani waved at him and said, “Well, I’ll see you tomorrow, wherever we meet! Have a nice night, okay?”

“You too!” Jiang called back, bringing his haul back home and thinking on what was to come. Honestly, he wasn’t sure if he was more excited for Kailani to visit him or worried about those bandits. And would Ning and Yin be able to meet up at the lake to see his new friend? What if they got caught up in those bandit problems, too?

Well… at the very least, he was confident that everything would be okay, no matter what happened. With Kailani, Ning, and Yin at his side, not even the strongest bandit group would be a match for him.

So he thought.