Faces. Oh, how beautiful faces could be. Soft. Round. Dimpled. Freckled. For many years, Jack collected faces and hung them on his wall. Trophies, they were. For animals, he took the whole head: deer, wolves, coyotes, what have you. Oh, but people? People who were so vulnerable, so weak that they relied on him for comfort and made him laugh because of their pathetic state of life?
RrrrrriiiiiIIP.
It was so satisfying, using his hands to strip flesh from bone. To see his prey scream and writhe. To watch the blood drip down their necks. More satisfying was taking the faces of those who tried so hard to look tough, who seemed to have it all. Those that struggled. It only made him happier when they fought back. That thrill, that excitement! All that energy, wasted in life as their very identity was taken away! Who would recognize a man with no face, if he even lived through the blood loss?
Jack marveled at his collection, rubbing his greasy hands together as his beady eyes flicked from one face to another. Memories of each struggle came back to him as he giggled and clapped like a schoolboy. He stopped to look at a face of a young girl named Arina, that poor girl whose mother abandoned her and father abused her like a ragdoll. Turned to him for comfort, for a friend, for escape. Read books to him and wrote poems that would move even the coldest heart, she thought. Told Jack she loved him and that she would do anything for him.
Her screams of pain and horror were so satisfying as he took the one thing he desired.
He recalled more and more memories until he finally stopped at the last face he took. Unlike the others, it was incomplete, only the area around the eyes stripped off. Dried, multicolored blood stained the wooden plaque it hung on. In an instant, his hands were trembling as he clenched his teeth, eyes threatening to pop out as he stared- no, glared at his mistake.
Siren. The only prey that escaped his grasp. Her voice alone moved Jack, made him feel... love. He flattered her, sent her flowers, gave her chocolates. Every day, he would stop by the fey's lake, in spite of the laws saying that demons could not cross into fey territory. She was kind and sweet. Her voice was like honey. She enjoyed his company for a while and teased him. He thought maybe, maybe she could be the one!
But when he confessed his undying love, she denied him. Said she didn't like him that way. His mind was in a fury. So to spite her, to try to take a so-called momento, to scare off anyone who dared try to take his prize, Jack's claws sank deep into her skin as he pulled it off. Honeyed, melodious words turned into dissonant screeching as little by little, skin peeled off. Jack could remember the colorful blood dripping, the sight of chaos behind her mask of skin. He grinned as he peeled off more and more like a fleshy facial mask, eager to take what was rightfully his!
But no. The harpies heard their distant breathren's cries. They swooped in and pecked, scratched, screamed. His hand was not steady and instead of taking the whole face, he took only a part. That was not all, though: Siren stood up defiantly, chaotic magic swirling around her fingers before she unleashed it upon her attacker. It hit Jack right in the face. He didn't know what it did then, but thinking about it now, it made him furious. His prey fought back and escaped. His trophy was a botched attempt. And he could not simply return, as the harpies knew what he had done and what he looked like.
Jack turned towards a mirror and leaned in, staring at what remained. Nothing but two beady eyes in a void, an endless void of nothing. His own face, stripped away.
If he had lips, he would grin. Only a matter of time before his treasure would be his.
Wednesday, January 29, 2014
Monday, January 27, 2014
Harpy Harps on: Ace Attorney: Dual Destinies
WARNING: POSSIBLE SPOILERS AHEAD. IF YOU INTEND ON GETTING THE GAME, YOU SHOULD PROBABLY JUST WAIT UNTIL YOU BEAT THE GAME UNTIL YOU JUDGE MY FOOLISH OPINIONS ON A FOOLISH GAME ABOUT FOOLISHLY FOOLISH FOOLS.
Fool doesn't even look like a real word anymore, thats how much I typed it. Jesus.
First, some background: Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney (or Gyakuten Saiban in Japan, roughly translated as "Turnabout Trial"), was originally released on October 11th, 2001 for the GBA in Japan. We got the Nintendo DS remake around September 15th, 2005. It is a murder mystery (or a whodunit?) game that involves using more logic than you would ever need to know, changing your perspective, then agressively pointing your finger at someone and screaming "OBJECTION" at the top of your lungs.
It was a great time to be a kid all those years ago... Wait.
The first game was followed by Justice for All and Trials and Tribulations, had a spinoff game based on one of the prosecutors girls fangirl about, and had one additional game based on a different lawyer, who continues the saga of barely getting out of court cases with his badge intact.
Unfortunately, I never actually had a chance to play any of those, as my start was in my sophmore year of High School, where in the middle of genetics class, my friend bust out his DS and started playing T&T, working on that one case where possession is involved and the demon in question has to be exorcised. You know the one. That clusterfuck of a case. Now, not knowing jack all about the series, I watched as my friend gave me the heads up about the case and played along. I'm pretty sure some time after that, I went on an Ace Attorney binge and watched the first three games whenever I was on a computer.
Cue another few years. Dual Destinies is out! Whoop. I didn't care much at first. Then a certain somebody started talking about the Ace Attorney series (thank you based Waddler), Dual Destinies game up, he pointed out the price...
I bought it. I actually bought my first Ace Attorney game.
OKAY ENOUGH BACKGROUND TIME TO PUT DOWN SOME INFO ON THIS GOOD GAME
Fool doesn't even look like a real word anymore, thats how much I typed it. Jesus.
First, some background: Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney (or Gyakuten Saiban in Japan, roughly translated as "Turnabout Trial"), was originally released on October 11th, 2001 for the GBA in Japan. We got the Nintendo DS remake around September 15th, 2005. It is a murder mystery (or a whodunit?) game that involves using more logic than you would ever need to know, changing your perspective, then agressively pointing your finger at someone and screaming "OBJECTION" at the top of your lungs.
It was a great time to be a kid all those years ago... Wait.
The first game was followed by Justice for All and Trials and Tribulations, had a spinoff game based on one of the prosecutors girls fangirl about, and had one additional game based on a different lawyer, who continues the saga of barely getting out of court cases with his badge intact.
Unfortunately, I never actually had a chance to play any of those, as my start was in my sophmore year of High School, where in the middle of genetics class, my friend bust out his DS and started playing T&T, working on that one case where possession is involved and the demon in question has to be exorcised. You know the one. That clusterfuck of a case. Now, not knowing jack all about the series, I watched as my friend gave me the heads up about the case and played along. I'm pretty sure some time after that, I went on an Ace Attorney binge and watched the first three games whenever I was on a computer.
Cue another few years. Dual Destinies is out! Whoop. I didn't care much at first. Then a certain somebody started talking about the Ace Attorney series (thank you based Waddler), Dual Destinies game up, he pointed out the price...
I bought it. I actually bought my first Ace Attorney game.
OKAY ENOUGH BACKGROUND TIME TO PUT DOWN SOME INFO ON THIS GOOD GAME
"Spiky hair, check. Idiot hairs, check. Who the hell are these other chucklefucks, though?" ~Me
Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney Dual Destinies came out on October 24th, 2013, much to many people's delight. It continues a year or so after the events of Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney transpired. Phoenix gets his Attorney's Badge back after a certain twat caused him to fuck up and lose it. The Dark Age of the Law is upon them. Lawyers and Prosecutors alike forge evidence. The end justifies the means. The events that started many, many more years go in DL-6 (Case 4 in Ace Attorney) spiral out and becomes more widespread. Truth no longer matters: you either win or you lose, much to the dismay of those being tried. People have lost hope in the Judicial System, as news of a Prosecutor who murdered someone spread.
To help turn things around, Phoenix hires another person to his ever-growing color wheel of attorneys Athena Cykes, who got her badge at the tender age of 18 and uses Analytical Psychology in the courtroom. Also returning is Mr. Demon Lawyer Mr. "I must spike my hair EVERY DAY" Apollo Justice, whose debut in the courtroom wasn't exactly pleasant and he has an ego the size of the sun. And its up to the trio to help restore faith to the Judicial System!
Returning mechanics from previous games are the Psyche-Locks that showed up in Justice For All, where you present evidence to break the locks on people's secrets (now without penalties!) and Perception from Apollo Justice, where you have to spot certain "tells" or nervous tics that give away the lies people are holding back. A new mechanic is the Mood Matrix, where you essentially have to watch the testimony on a screen that shows the four emotions: Happiness, Anger, Sadness, and Shock. Anything that seems out of place, you have to pinpoint it out and help the client get the truth out there.
An example of the Mood Matrix in action is, say, Ms. Baker's up on the witness stand. She's scared out of her wits, her words are jumbled mess. Out comes Athena with Widget and the Mood Matrix, and pictures show up on the screen! Ms. Baker testifies, "And then I saw my husband, dead!" Shock lights up like a yellow police siren, but Sadness? Nothing. Then you pinpoint that out because that's certainly off, right? You'd be sad if your husband died, right? Wait, a majority of you are men, nevermind... Unless you roll that way. :P
That's just the most basic application of Mood Matrix, though. It certainly gets a lot more complex, but I can't go spoiling everything, can I?
Anyway, Dual Destinies is a pleasant return of the Ace Attorney series, bringing back all the favorite themes and finger pointing with a twist. Its friendly to both newbies and veterans alike. The graphics and soundtrack are goddamn amazing. Everything seems to be more lively than before. A new prosecutor is a mainstay! Court Record's all there to review and go wonder "HMMM SHOULD I USE THIS OR THIS?"
It is, however, a bit... too easy. Its easy to savescum when you're an absolute perfectionist. Important thing that you probably remember? The game's gonna do a flashback. Hell, they even have a notes section in the Court Record just in case you forgot something! It will hammer the most important points of cases right into your skull. Sure, you'll fuck up anyway, but Dual Destinies is the overprotective mom that wraps her kids in bubble wrap compared to Ace Attorney, who just laughs and watches his kid go down a cliff. (Seriously, who came up with that five strikes system? CAPCOOOM!!!!!)
All in all, though, if you had to start an Ace Attorney game for the first time, I would go with Dual Destinies, as it'll help out and teach you the basics and give you more hints than any other game in the series. You want more twists? Hello there, Destinies! How about DLC? Okay, I haven't played the DLC.
Oh wait, did I mention the game has ANIME CUTSCENES? Yeah, they have those.
I give this game a solid 9/10. Pretty good game, sometimes comes off as too easy, but its enjoyable enough as it is.
Now go out there and fucking scream Objection at your 3DS! Its only 30 dollars on the eShop!
Once I get my cable split for my headset, I'll give you guys a taste of my own objection. A very awkward one.
Saturday, January 25, 2014
Intergalatic Turnabout: Investigation (ZFRP Related)
Any lawyer worth their salt, whether defense attorney or prosecutor, started with the investigations. Usually, detectives and police handle that, then hand over all the relavent information over to the lawyers for review. However, in more recent days, lawyers have taken things into their own hands, finding things that detectives seem to overlook and understanding the situation better than others.
Apollo couldn't exactly go over to the supposed crime scene, though. A ticket to New York from California was more costly than he could afford. His wallet was already crying after Athena bought a few knick knacks from Nine Tails Vale. A trip to Manhattan, on top of a trip to space in about three months or so? Not even the money he gained from his recent cases would be able to pay all that off, along with the monthly rent of his apartment!
So what better way to start researching than to borrow Phoenix's laptop, go back to his apartment, and go from there? He relaxed in his chair as the laptop booted up, marveling at all the photos and newspaper clippings on the walls. Of his debut in court. Of his triumphs in the Turnabout Serenade. Of the Jury System test and more. Various Gyaxa paraphanillia, such as Clay Terran's coat and pictures of the HAT-2 launch, sat on top of his dresser. A radio sat on his bad, softly playing "The Guitar's Serenade" on repeat.
Once the laptop was booted up, it was all a matter of searching the internet about Manhattan incidents. The most recent article he could pull up was titled, "A Living Nightmare: Dragon Swarm Destroys Part of Manhattan". From what he could glean of the details, witness reports claim that the skies were darkened in the afternoon before someone realized that it was a cloud of dragons, swooping down and tearing apart anything they could reach. The leader of the dragons happened to be a knight one King of Beasts patron named Josephine Boutelle said was named Garland, and his motive was to get revenge on her family and herself, while causing the most damage possible.
"This can't be real," Apollo muttered under his breath as he read the more specific details. "You gotta be kidding me. They're all just actors, right? People in a lot of dragon suits?"
His hopes of that being a fantasy were dashed when he saw that someone managed to take a picture of a barbarianess fighting off a dragon belching out flames. No, those were real dragons, alright. How they were real and hid from scientists for hundreds of years, he had no clue. But these were all second hand accounts, right? What about first-hand accounts?
Could he even question this Josephine? How about her relatives? The search began anew, and while he had to dig through a bunch of unrelated articles and a forum topic related to "Celestial Buns" ("I...I don't think I'll ever wash my brain of that."), he finally found some contact information about her sister, Sarah Triden. Eager to take his new lead somewhere, Apollo opened up a video chat program and dialed in the number, hoping that the girl would be actually there.
Riiiing. Riiiing.
Click.
"Hello?"
That didn't sound like a girl's voice. In fact, the video showed a man, blonde hair a mess, an idiot hair waggling about, and a cat wrestling in his arms.
"You... you don't happen to be Sarah Triden, are you?" Apollo asked, breaking out into a sweat.
"No, I'm actually her husband, Alex Triden. Er, is this important? I can't stay here long, I have to handle the latest addition to our family."
Husband? Guess he shouldn't be surprised. With a sigh, Apollo said, "I'm Apollo Justice, an attorney at law. There happens to be a lawsuit coming up against you guys and your friends at the King of Beasts from Manhattan, and I would like to get you guys clear of all charges. You wouldn't have happened to be involved in the Dragon Swarm incident, have you?"
Alex tilted his head a little and blinked. "Is that what they're calling it? Well, erm, I do have a bit of relation to it... I faught the knight who caused it. I'm also a patron of the King of Beasts, although I've been absent. A lawsuit sounds like a big problem, though."
"I'd be more worried about whether or not you killed anyone, because if anybody has proof of that, you might be as good as gone. Although a big dent to savings isn't too good, either. Could you tell me more about the King of Beasts and those fishy incidents?"
The blonde man blinked again before setting the cat down and crossing his arms. "The King of Beasts started as a bar to talk about the bloody fights between modified, powerful animals. Most of the incidents happened after the event we call the Big Bar Brawl, where the patrons fought to the death. A robot one that one, but that's not important. After that, our pasts seemed to catch up with us, and various dangerous incidents started happening. I mean, two of the patrons were Space Marines, and I had to face off with someone who was capable of using a powerful, destructive spell. We killed him of course-"
"Woah, woah, woah, hold the phone!" Apollo was terrified by how much he was sweating now. "You mean you admit to murder?"
Alex's idiot hair drooped as he bend his neck downward. "W-well, yeah, we didn't have much of a choice for most of the incidents," he replied gloomily. "It was do or die. Its not something the normal police could handle. This was supernatural stuff! I only wish the police could have done something about the Lord situation before it got out of hand-"
"Uh.... Lord situation?"
"Er...its complicated. Simply put, the Lord was someone with a great hatred for humanity and wanted to destroy everything. We put a stop to him, but he was... extremely difficult to kill."
Of course. A supervillain. Right in the middle of New York. Wonderful. Apollo gulped before putting a finger to his forehead and thinking long and hard. "So all of the patrons were responsible for the murder of some villain of the week,"Apollo stated, "otherwise there'd be more casualties. But murder's still murder. You guys could get some serious jail time for that, even if some guy makes some stupid claim about wanting to get revenge! And you seriously think bringing your own problems into a usually peaceful city is a good idea?"
If Alex didn't look guilty before, he looked even guilter now, the color draining from his face. "I'm sorry," he said, "but... you'd understand more if you experienced it for yourself."
"Not that I have a choice," Apollo grumbled. "600 dollars for a ticket, though? I don't even have that much!"
Alex seemed pensive for a moment. He even had the same look Athena had when she had her thinking cap on. "If it's money you need, I'd be willing to vouch for you and get you a discount. I'd even pay for it! We have a little amusement park in Manhattan that brings in quite a bit of money each year, so I don't mind using it to help you."
The attorney stared for a moment, wide eyed. "You'd... you'd pay for all my expenses?"
"Of course! If you're really interested in investigating this more, you really have to understand how everything works at the King of Beasts before making a fair judgement! I'll even pay for the hotel costs. And maybe a weapon or two of your choice."
"Wait...a weapon? Why would I need one?"
His client smiled apologetically over the screen. The moment he saw it, Apollo began to sweat bullets. Almost as if he knew...
"Where you're going, it's better to be safe than dead."
Oh dear. Apollo bit off more than he could chew, and there was no turning back.
Apollo couldn't exactly go over to the supposed crime scene, though. A ticket to New York from California was more costly than he could afford. His wallet was already crying after Athena bought a few knick knacks from Nine Tails Vale. A trip to Manhattan, on top of a trip to space in about three months or so? Not even the money he gained from his recent cases would be able to pay all that off, along with the monthly rent of his apartment!
So what better way to start researching than to borrow Phoenix's laptop, go back to his apartment, and go from there? He relaxed in his chair as the laptop booted up, marveling at all the photos and newspaper clippings on the walls. Of his debut in court. Of his triumphs in the Turnabout Serenade. Of the Jury System test and more. Various Gyaxa paraphanillia, such as Clay Terran's coat and pictures of the HAT-2 launch, sat on top of his dresser. A radio sat on his bad, softly playing "The Guitar's Serenade" on repeat.
Once the laptop was booted up, it was all a matter of searching the internet about Manhattan incidents. The most recent article he could pull up was titled, "A Living Nightmare: Dragon Swarm Destroys Part of Manhattan". From what he could glean of the details, witness reports claim that the skies were darkened in the afternoon before someone realized that it was a cloud of dragons, swooping down and tearing apart anything they could reach. The leader of the dragons happened to be a knight one King of Beasts patron named Josephine Boutelle said was named Garland, and his motive was to get revenge on her family and herself, while causing the most damage possible.
"This can't be real," Apollo muttered under his breath as he read the more specific details. "You gotta be kidding me. They're all just actors, right? People in a lot of dragon suits?"
His hopes of that being a fantasy were dashed when he saw that someone managed to take a picture of a barbarianess fighting off a dragon belching out flames. No, those were real dragons, alright. How they were real and hid from scientists for hundreds of years, he had no clue. But these were all second hand accounts, right? What about first-hand accounts?
Could he even question this Josephine? How about her relatives? The search began anew, and while he had to dig through a bunch of unrelated articles and a forum topic related to "Celestial Buns" ("I...I don't think I'll ever wash my brain of that."), he finally found some contact information about her sister, Sarah Triden. Eager to take his new lead somewhere, Apollo opened up a video chat program and dialed in the number, hoping that the girl would be actually there.
Riiiing. Riiiing.
Click.
"Hello?"
That didn't sound like a girl's voice. In fact, the video showed a man, blonde hair a mess, an idiot hair waggling about, and a cat wrestling in his arms.
"You... you don't happen to be Sarah Triden, are you?" Apollo asked, breaking out into a sweat.
"No, I'm actually her husband, Alex Triden. Er, is this important? I can't stay here long, I have to handle the latest addition to our family."
Husband? Guess he shouldn't be surprised. With a sigh, Apollo said, "I'm Apollo Justice, an attorney at law. There happens to be a lawsuit coming up against you guys and your friends at the King of Beasts from Manhattan, and I would like to get you guys clear of all charges. You wouldn't have happened to be involved in the Dragon Swarm incident, have you?"
Alex tilted his head a little and blinked. "Is that what they're calling it? Well, erm, I do have a bit of relation to it... I faught the knight who caused it. I'm also a patron of the King of Beasts, although I've been absent. A lawsuit sounds like a big problem, though."
"I'd be more worried about whether or not you killed anyone, because if anybody has proof of that, you might be as good as gone. Although a big dent to savings isn't too good, either. Could you tell me more about the King of Beasts and those fishy incidents?"
The blonde man blinked again before setting the cat down and crossing his arms. "The King of Beasts started as a bar to talk about the bloody fights between modified, powerful animals. Most of the incidents happened after the event we call the Big Bar Brawl, where the patrons fought to the death. A robot one that one, but that's not important. After that, our pasts seemed to catch up with us, and various dangerous incidents started happening. I mean, two of the patrons were Space Marines, and I had to face off with someone who was capable of using a powerful, destructive spell. We killed him of course-"
"Woah, woah, woah, hold the phone!" Apollo was terrified by how much he was sweating now. "You mean you admit to murder?"
Alex's idiot hair drooped as he bend his neck downward. "W-well, yeah, we didn't have much of a choice for most of the incidents," he replied gloomily. "It was do or die. Its not something the normal police could handle. This was supernatural stuff! I only wish the police could have done something about the Lord situation before it got out of hand-"
"Uh.... Lord situation?"
"Er...its complicated. Simply put, the Lord was someone with a great hatred for humanity and wanted to destroy everything. We put a stop to him, but he was... extremely difficult to kill."
Of course. A supervillain. Right in the middle of New York. Wonderful. Apollo gulped before putting a finger to his forehead and thinking long and hard. "So all of the patrons were responsible for the murder of some villain of the week,"Apollo stated, "otherwise there'd be more casualties. But murder's still murder. You guys could get some serious jail time for that, even if some guy makes some stupid claim about wanting to get revenge! And you seriously think bringing your own problems into a usually peaceful city is a good idea?"
If Alex didn't look guilty before, he looked even guilter now, the color draining from his face. "I'm sorry," he said, "but... you'd understand more if you experienced it for yourself."
"Not that I have a choice," Apollo grumbled. "600 dollars for a ticket, though? I don't even have that much!"
Alex seemed pensive for a moment. He even had the same look Athena had when she had her thinking cap on. "If it's money you need, I'd be willing to vouch for you and get you a discount. I'd even pay for it! We have a little amusement park in Manhattan that brings in quite a bit of money each year, so I don't mind using it to help you."
The attorney stared for a moment, wide eyed. "You'd... you'd pay for all my expenses?"
"Of course! If you're really interested in investigating this more, you really have to understand how everything works at the King of Beasts before making a fair judgement! I'll even pay for the hotel costs. And maybe a weapon or two of your choice."
"Wait...a weapon? Why would I need one?"
His client smiled apologetically over the screen. The moment he saw it, Apollo began to sweat bullets. Almost as if he knew...
"Where you're going, it's better to be safe than dead."
Oh dear. Apollo bit off more than he could chew, and there was no turning back.
Friday, January 24, 2014
Intergalactic Turnabout (Zoofights Roleplay Related)
The Wright Anything Agency. Once Wright and Co. Law Offices, its now known as a talent agency with a grand total of one person who was actually talented at anything. Phoenix Wright and his co-workers were lawyers that didn't know the first thing about even playing a piano. The past cases certainly brought a lot of new faces over, seeking defense attorneys to help them get a Not Guilty verdict. Today, though, it was rather pea-
"AAAGH!"
Scratch that. Someone was yelling loud enough to crack a glass Phoenix was trying to drink water from. A certain attorney, dressed in red, was scouring the entire giant mess of an office, wide eyed and desperate. His yellow clothed co-worker certainly didn't appreciate a pile of dirty laundry toppling over on her boots as he dug through every inch of office.
"Where is it?!" he asked, exasperated, his two hairs drooping, face breaking into a sweat. "Where did I put it?! I could have sworn it was somewhere!"
"Calm down!" a co-worker said after picking up the laundry and grumbling something under her breath. "Its not like you to freak out like this, Apollo!" A pause. "Actually, it's totally in character for you to freak out. What did ya lose, anyway?"
"The most important thing: My attorney's badge!" There went tools and files, flying about in his desperate search. "I know I had it when I walked in earlier, but now it's not even on my lapel!"
Phoenix chuckled. This was completely normal at this rate. He could bet a bowl of Eldoon's Noodles that Trucy made it disappear and would reveal it in another "Magic Panties" trick. He had to admit, watching Apollo scramble around in a panic for his badge was a bit amusing. However, he knew that the minute Pearls saw this mess, she would give everybody a scolding. After all, she had been diligently cleaning up the office every time before it closed. It would always find a way to become a mess again, much to her dismay. Apollo certainly wasn't helping, though.
Tired of Polly's flailing about, Athena glared at Phoenix. "Alright, boss, where's Trucy?" she asked. "I'd hate to see Apollo in trouble if he has a big case today!"
"She went out for a bit," Phoenix replied, taking a sip of water from his glass. "She'll be back soon, don't worry. Now, we haven't had a case in a bit. Anything new happening with you guys?"
Apollo stopped his scrambling and groaned. "Nothing, absolutely nothing. Not even a small fry case!"
"I feel you," Phoenix sighed. "Nothing on my end, either." He turned to Athena, who was playing around with her moon-shaped earring, a pensive look on her face. "I'm guessing you might have a clue about any new cases?"
The yellow clothed lawyer didn't speak at all for several minutes. All eyes were on her. When she finally spoke, her voice was shaky. "W-well, I did hear about an entire city on the east coast trying to file a suit against this 'King of Beasts' place for collateral damage..."
Apollo blinked. "What kind of collateral damage are we talking about? Small damage? Big damage?"
"Try, 'almost leveled an entire city due to their trouble magnetism'."
Athena watched as both Phoenix's and Apollo's jaws dropped. Who would attract so much trouble, the danger they attracted would level a city?
"I mean, I heard that there was this bar in Manhattan that hosted people who talked about this huge Zoofights thing. Then they started getting odder and odder customers, and then those guys attracted big baddies. I heard a lot of news about some monster which almost broke reality, then some invasion of dragons caused by a knight. Those guys moved into space, but now Gyaxa's reporting that some other planet's getting their share of bad luck from these guys!"
A stunned silence filled the room. No movement, no sound, nothing. It was only when Apollo composed himself again when the silence broke. "You're kidding, right? You mean someone's gotta prove these guys innocent? I mean, it can't be just collateral damage, right? Humor me here... if there were actually dragons, which don't exist, then someone must have died, right? No defense attorney in their right minds would even think of defending them!"
"They get to be in a spaceship, though!" Athena added, putting her hands together and smiling. "I mean, the people who are the trouble magnets, anyway. Beyond the moon! Not even Mr. Starbuck has gone past there! We should totally take this case on and see if that city's claims even hold any weight!" She hastily added, "Well, I'd go, but even getting one ticket is pretty expensive... And I'm not experienced with lawsuits too well. Analytical psychology isn't useful there too much. If someone actually murdered somone else, sure!"
"I rather not take on a case that complicated, either," Phoenix said, arms crossed. "That would require a lot of investigation. Not only that, it would seem cut and dry, provided that the city has proof of all the damages done. If they have proof of murder, too... Someone's going to jail, for sure."
That left Apollo. A hand was on his chin as he thought deeply about this. It would require a lot of investigation, sure. Hell, the city might even drop charges because there's so much proof they'd have to gather about all those supernatural events. But if he could win this case, his name would be known around the world... And he'd get to be in space! Who'd turn down a chance to be in space?
"I'll take it, then!" the red-suited attorney declared, arms crossed, a smug look on his face. "It's not the strangest case I've taken! I'll prove that they're not responsible, and that they didn't cause any murders as a result!"
Athena gave Apollo a thumbs up, but Phoenix pulled out a computer and started researching. Apollo was just too happy to get out of toilet cleaning duty to care about that stern look on his boss's face. It all faded away when Phoenix said, "Um, Apollo? I have some bad news..."
"Tickets to get a shuttle onto the ship are $600. For the whole season."
Well, Apollo's jaw wasn't going to get off the ground anytime soon. Six hundred dollars, just to get something more interesting than nothing. Goodbye, his life savings. He hardly knew ye...
"AAAGH!"
Scratch that. Someone was yelling loud enough to crack a glass Phoenix was trying to drink water from. A certain attorney, dressed in red, was scouring the entire giant mess of an office, wide eyed and desperate. His yellow clothed co-worker certainly didn't appreciate a pile of dirty laundry toppling over on her boots as he dug through every inch of office.
"Where is it?!" he asked, exasperated, his two hairs drooping, face breaking into a sweat. "Where did I put it?! I could have sworn it was somewhere!"
"Calm down!" a co-worker said after picking up the laundry and grumbling something under her breath. "Its not like you to freak out like this, Apollo!" A pause. "Actually, it's totally in character for you to freak out. What did ya lose, anyway?"
"The most important thing: My attorney's badge!" There went tools and files, flying about in his desperate search. "I know I had it when I walked in earlier, but now it's not even on my lapel!"
Phoenix chuckled. This was completely normal at this rate. He could bet a bowl of Eldoon's Noodles that Trucy made it disappear and would reveal it in another "Magic Panties" trick. He had to admit, watching Apollo scramble around in a panic for his badge was a bit amusing. However, he knew that the minute Pearls saw this mess, she would give everybody a scolding. After all, she had been diligently cleaning up the office every time before it closed. It would always find a way to become a mess again, much to her dismay. Apollo certainly wasn't helping, though.
Tired of Polly's flailing about, Athena glared at Phoenix. "Alright, boss, where's Trucy?" she asked. "I'd hate to see Apollo in trouble if he has a big case today!"
"She went out for a bit," Phoenix replied, taking a sip of water from his glass. "She'll be back soon, don't worry. Now, we haven't had a case in a bit. Anything new happening with you guys?"
Apollo stopped his scrambling and groaned. "Nothing, absolutely nothing. Not even a small fry case!"
"I feel you," Phoenix sighed. "Nothing on my end, either." He turned to Athena, who was playing around with her moon-shaped earring, a pensive look on her face. "I'm guessing you might have a clue about any new cases?"
The yellow clothed lawyer didn't speak at all for several minutes. All eyes were on her. When she finally spoke, her voice was shaky. "W-well, I did hear about an entire city on the east coast trying to file a suit against this 'King of Beasts' place for collateral damage..."
Apollo blinked. "What kind of collateral damage are we talking about? Small damage? Big damage?"
"Try, 'almost leveled an entire city due to their trouble magnetism'."
Athena watched as both Phoenix's and Apollo's jaws dropped. Who would attract so much trouble, the danger they attracted would level a city?
"I mean, I heard that there was this bar in Manhattan that hosted people who talked about this huge Zoofights thing. Then they started getting odder and odder customers, and then those guys attracted big baddies. I heard a lot of news about some monster which almost broke reality, then some invasion of dragons caused by a knight. Those guys moved into space, but now Gyaxa's reporting that some other planet's getting their share of bad luck from these guys!"
A stunned silence filled the room. No movement, no sound, nothing. It was only when Apollo composed himself again when the silence broke. "You're kidding, right? You mean someone's gotta prove these guys innocent? I mean, it can't be just collateral damage, right? Humor me here... if there were actually dragons, which don't exist, then someone must have died, right? No defense attorney in their right minds would even think of defending them!"
"They get to be in a spaceship, though!" Athena added, putting her hands together and smiling. "I mean, the people who are the trouble magnets, anyway. Beyond the moon! Not even Mr. Starbuck has gone past there! We should totally take this case on and see if that city's claims even hold any weight!" She hastily added, "Well, I'd go, but even getting one ticket is pretty expensive... And I'm not experienced with lawsuits too well. Analytical psychology isn't useful there too much. If someone actually murdered somone else, sure!"
"I rather not take on a case that complicated, either," Phoenix said, arms crossed. "That would require a lot of investigation. Not only that, it would seem cut and dry, provided that the city has proof of all the damages done. If they have proof of murder, too... Someone's going to jail, for sure."
That left Apollo. A hand was on his chin as he thought deeply about this. It would require a lot of investigation, sure. Hell, the city might even drop charges because there's so much proof they'd have to gather about all those supernatural events. But if he could win this case, his name would be known around the world... And he'd get to be in space! Who'd turn down a chance to be in space?
"I'll take it, then!" the red-suited attorney declared, arms crossed, a smug look on his face. "It's not the strangest case I've taken! I'll prove that they're not responsible, and that they didn't cause any murders as a result!"
Athena gave Apollo a thumbs up, but Phoenix pulled out a computer and started researching. Apollo was just too happy to get out of toilet cleaning duty to care about that stern look on his boss's face. It all faded away when Phoenix said, "Um, Apollo? I have some bad news..."
"Tickets to get a shuttle onto the ship are $600. For the whole season."
Well, Apollo's jaw wasn't going to get off the ground anytime soon. Six hundred dollars, just to get something more interesting than nothing. Goodbye, his life savings. He hardly knew ye...
Tuesday, January 21, 2014
Harpy Muses: Levia and how THAT Came to be
Most of you know that I make all sorts of universes and characters that reside in them. Some are inspired by anime (looking at Cu Sith, which was clearly inspired by Fairy Tail). Others, by dreams (Uh, go look at Sophia and Gluttony's little fuckup, yes?). Levia, I can say, came from being inspired by the Final Fantasy series and ripping it off, although as time went on, I eased up on "rip off" and went in a more original direction.
How'd it come out like this? I was pretty damn bored in high school and needed something to distract myself. RedSpy, as everybody in Chatzy knows him , was sort of my accomplice in working everything out. The basic theme was trust: Trust between comrades, distrust between kingdoms as they try to get power, ties that bind. It would all be kindled by a tiny, gullible, newly-ranked knight, and a stubborn, boisterious, powerful mage who hides behind a thick fog (or now, a bird-like mask). Ego and Id. Wind and fire, fueling the arguments between them until a third member stepped in and calmed them both. A quest to prevent a dark evil from returning by protecting the last remaining heirs of hero's blood (of olden times) and the crowns that, together, keep the seal shut.
I planned it to be some sort of epic in 4 parts, but I was...kind of too lazy to write it. Not only that, ideas change. I added in races and a proper pantheon, so the race of our devious little fire mage changed. (He's a tiefling now, though he hides it well.) I'm planning out a map, even though its tiny as hell on a tiny sheet of paper. Locales are different, politics are different (hell, have I even thought that far?), magic... Okay, the thing about magic has never changed, and that's basically "everybody has magic, but everybody tends to specialize in their own brand, and you gotta have some warriors to take on those who are immune to magic".
Storybuilding is hard, ya'll.
There have been characters that have been cut out from the original and characters added in. Now it even has an alternate universe that I am trying to think about more and write about. I bullshitted some information about Levia throughout year 1 of Zoofights Roleplay, because duuur I was a high schooler in the middle of a bridge program between college and who has time to think on shit? There are certain definites, though: Alex, Xavier, Chuck, and Sarah are must haves. Garnet and Stella, too, but they might not be major characters. Unfortunately.
I'm hoping that I can come up with some definite details about it and eventually make a decent map, but then I'll get nitpicky about the weather. "UGH ITS UP NORTH, IT HAS TO BE COLD, DOESN'T IT? AND SHIT THAT PLACE IS AT THE EQUATOR, IT MUST BE BOILING HOT, TIME TO PUT A DESERT THERE"
For now, though, sit back, relax, and look at this pastebin.
http://pastebin.com/87VarFzX
I GOT THE BEGINNING MYTHOSeven though it doesn't sound as nice as Steel Komodo's, oh well
How'd it come out like this? I was pretty damn bored in high school and needed something to distract myself. RedSpy, as everybody in Chatzy knows him , was sort of my accomplice in working everything out. The basic theme was trust: Trust between comrades, distrust between kingdoms as they try to get power, ties that bind. It would all be kindled by a tiny, gullible, newly-ranked knight, and a stubborn, boisterious, powerful mage who hides behind a thick fog (or now, a bird-like mask). Ego and Id. Wind and fire, fueling the arguments between them until a third member stepped in and calmed them both. A quest to prevent a dark evil from returning by protecting the last remaining heirs of hero's blood (of olden times) and the crowns that, together, keep the seal shut.
I planned it to be some sort of epic in 4 parts, but I was...kind of too lazy to write it. Not only that, ideas change. I added in races and a proper pantheon, so the race of our devious little fire mage changed. (He's a tiefling now, though he hides it well.) I'm planning out a map, even though its tiny as hell on a tiny sheet of paper. Locales are different, politics are different (hell, have I even thought that far?), magic... Okay, the thing about magic has never changed, and that's basically "everybody has magic, but everybody tends to specialize in their own brand, and you gotta have some warriors to take on those who are immune to magic".
Storybuilding is hard, ya'll.
There have been characters that have been cut out from the original and characters added in. Now it even has an alternate universe that I am trying to think about more and write about. I bullshitted some information about Levia throughout year 1 of Zoofights Roleplay, because duuur I was a high schooler in the middle of a bridge program between college and who has time to think on shit? There are certain definites, though: Alex, Xavier, Chuck, and Sarah are must haves. Garnet and Stella, too, but they might not be major characters. Unfortunately.
I'm hoping that I can come up with some definite details about it and eventually make a decent map, but then I'll get nitpicky about the weather. "UGH ITS UP NORTH, IT HAS TO BE COLD, DOESN'T IT? AND SHIT THAT PLACE IS AT THE EQUATOR, IT MUST BE BOILING HOT, TIME TO PUT A DESERT THERE"
For now, though, sit back, relax, and look at this pastebin.
http://pastebin.com/87VarFzX
I GOT THE BEGINNING MYTHOS
Thursday, January 16, 2014
Levian Anthology, Part 1: Greater Gods (In Character Thingy)
(Note: This doesn't take place in the more dystopian Levia. It takes place in the...well, "GOOD" ending, where Yursarsh is as dead as a doorknob. Okay, with that said, carry on!)
Oh? A stranger? How... odd. It is not often that I see a new face. Levia is merely a lone continent in the vast sea of mystery. Her fellow continents have been devoured by the gluttonous Yursarsh, God of Gods, in a fit of rage as he was tossed from the heavens. I was unsure of any other survivors of his rampage. It is unlikely that he left even a crumb of his meal behind.
Who am I? How rude of me. I am Xavier Dean. Not many years ago, I was tasked to defeat Yursarsh, with many an ally by my side. Long and daunting as the road was, I was finally able to defeat him and destroy his very soul. It was not easy to summon a meteor, nevermind survive it. How did I survive? I have my ways, believe me! Please, though, keep my existance hidden from a particular tiny knight. I have heard he has recently settled down with holy woman. I wish I was there for the wedding, but alas...
Regardless, you did not come here to hear me ramble of the past, yes? So what did you come here for?
...I see. You wish to know more of Levia, so you may spread word of it to other lands? Interesting. We know nothing of any other world except our own. We've been isolated for millenum now. No imports or exports. We sustain our own economy, fight our own wars. How odd you come to us now...
Bah, I suppose I am too formal for my own good. When your own home is merely a house full of books and tomes, you start to talk like the scholars you read so much about.
First, to understand Levia, you must understand our system of faith. Our gods. Our gods are responsible for creating and maintaining everything that occurs. They do not interfere with our daily lives, but they do influence the environment in subtle ways. There are many, many gods when there was once seven, mostly because of the gods having children and deciding that as societies develop, they too must change with the times and have other gods represent those concepts mortals believe in.
Gods are separated into two categories: Greater Gods and Lesser Gods. The Greater Gods are the eldest, the original six, that govern the elements: Light and Darkness. Water and Fire. Earth and Wind. There is a seventh, but he merely makes sure that the gods are doing their jobs and keeping to their promises. They are the ones that created our planet and created the many races that walk here today.
The first and possibly eldest of the gods is Yuran, God of Light. He represents logos. The mind. Light. Justice. Loyalty. Bravery. Law. His symbols are commonly the hammer and armor, the dove. He thinks before he acts, leads his siblings towards the right path. Clerics revere him, as his power provides healing for all, healing and peace. If anyone wishes for peace, they pray to him alone. Ever since Yursarsh turned on the gods, he has been the interim God of Gods, managing the tasks all gods must do. Must cause a lot of strain on him, as more and more people who claim to see his visage say that he's sprouting silver hairs. Oh, before I forget, the race that he represents are the Fairies, small in size but supposedly pure of heart and more... logical than most. I think they're rather boring, but that's a tale for another day!
His counterpart is Ursula, Goddess of Darkness. Most fear her and damn her name just based on the fact that they associate darkness with evil. Whatever they say, though, it's not true. Darkness is uncertainty, chaos, ethos. Wisdom is what she represents. She despises those who do not change with the times, those who remain stagnent. "What fun is life if it's all the same all the time?" she tends to ask. If her brother represents the mind, she represents the heart, ever changing with the situation. Not many people worship her aside from her patron race, the Tieflings, and mages such as myself, who strive for that wisdom she seeks. Her common symbols, if you are lucky to even find one, are the tome and the raven.
Patron god of the Undines is Eriel, Goddess of Water. She governs the calm streams, the bubbling brooks, the high tides. She stands for the calm thoughts, purity, health, kindness, and mystery. She could be as bubbly as a brook, as cold as a block of ice, or as flighty as steam. Moody as she is, she is also worshiped by priests, as water she creates is claimed to be able to purify any ailment and sear the undead. She is also representative of strength and calamity, as huge tides are capable of tearing down a town all on its own, all signs of life lost into the deep, eternal blue. The trident is her symbol and her weapon of choice. I guess you could get away with a water drop being a symbol, but there are hundreds of water gods that try to lay claim to that symbol for their own.
With water comes fire, and Axanon, God of Fire, is Eriel's counterpart. Passion of all kinds is what he stands for. War. Warmth. Destruction. Purification. When war is inevitible, one prays to him for victory and honor before heading to the battlefield. The blade, flames, and scales of dragons are commonly seen as symbols for him, and statues of him holding Excalibur in his claws are usually found in castles. Fire is hard to put out, isn't it? Not even water can completely douse the fiery passions in one's heart. Axanon believes in following your passions, no matter what they may be, to the very end. Share them with the very world. However, his fiercer side demands that those of foul nature be set aflame until nothing but ashes remain, to purify the evils that plague the world at hand. He is as gentle as a flickering candle flame when needed, or as fierce as a forest fire. He is the patron god of Dragons, even if most have evolved to do things other than breathe flames as he does. He is also my patron god...
Oh dear, please don't look at my burned hands like that. It makes me nervous! I-I had problems once, okay? Er, um, if you can stop staring...
A-anyway! Next is the god of wind, Zephyrus. Or, as most call him, Zephyr. He's a flighty one, and he represents the spirit, speed, the spreading of knowledge, and change. While Ursula represents change as well, hers is more gradual change, while Zephyr represents rapid, sudden change. What might be a gentle breeze can turn into a whirlwind in an instant, yes? He only wishes for people to be lively, spread the news, and, of course, not fear change. Recently, though, he has also tacked on for people to be courageous in the face of danger and not back down, and don't let anything hold you back from adventure. Harpies, the race he created, follow that creed to their deathbed, soaring the skies and exploring every nook and cranny. His symbol? He never decided on a symbol. Claims he's above that sort of thing, I suppose...
Finally, we have Terra, Goddess of Earth. Stubborn one and quirky, compared to her fellow gods. Her patron races are the Humans and the Giants. She represents... well, I suppose you could say she, too, represents life. After all, isn't the ground we stand on her doing? Anyway, she stands for the seasons, the fertility of crops, the physical, stability and honesty. Common symbols are the bull, mountains, or trees. All life is precious to her, but life isn't so fragile that she watches over it. "People of all sorts are stubborn bastards," she once claimed. "Not even death can stand in their way." People associate her with tradition as well, as some things, according to them, should not be changed at all. She believes that those that look upon her do their best to deal with the harsh world and perservere through the "winter" of their lives, and "stick to what you know best."
I did mention a seventh one, but... His story is long. VERY long. And I kind of dropped a meteor on him. That, my friend, is for another time.
Speaking of time, we seem to be out of time, judging by how you're standing up and getting ready to go. Do drop by again, and send a warning so I can prepare some tea. Perhaps we can talk more about books and all...
Oh, wondering about the tiny knight? Um... I rather not speak of him right now. Maybe later. Our history goes way back, and its...complicated. Til next time!
Oh? A stranger? How... odd. It is not often that I see a new face. Levia is merely a lone continent in the vast sea of mystery. Her fellow continents have been devoured by the gluttonous Yursarsh, God of Gods, in a fit of rage as he was tossed from the heavens. I was unsure of any other survivors of his rampage. It is unlikely that he left even a crumb of his meal behind.
Who am I? How rude of me. I am Xavier Dean. Not many years ago, I was tasked to defeat Yursarsh, with many an ally by my side. Long and daunting as the road was, I was finally able to defeat him and destroy his very soul. It was not easy to summon a meteor, nevermind survive it. How did I survive? I have my ways, believe me! Please, though, keep my existance hidden from a particular tiny knight. I have heard he has recently settled down with holy woman. I wish I was there for the wedding, but alas...
Regardless, you did not come here to hear me ramble of the past, yes? So what did you come here for?
...I see. You wish to know more of Levia, so you may spread word of it to other lands? Interesting. We know nothing of any other world except our own. We've been isolated for millenum now. No imports or exports. We sustain our own economy, fight our own wars. How odd you come to us now...
Bah, I suppose I am too formal for my own good. When your own home is merely a house full of books and tomes, you start to talk like the scholars you read so much about.
First, to understand Levia, you must understand our system of faith. Our gods. Our gods are responsible for creating and maintaining everything that occurs. They do not interfere with our daily lives, but they do influence the environment in subtle ways. There are many, many gods when there was once seven, mostly because of the gods having children and deciding that as societies develop, they too must change with the times and have other gods represent those concepts mortals believe in.
Gods are separated into two categories: Greater Gods and Lesser Gods. The Greater Gods are the eldest, the original six, that govern the elements: Light and Darkness. Water and Fire. Earth and Wind. There is a seventh, but he merely makes sure that the gods are doing their jobs and keeping to their promises. They are the ones that created our planet and created the many races that walk here today.
The first and possibly eldest of the gods is Yuran, God of Light. He represents logos. The mind. Light. Justice. Loyalty. Bravery. Law. His symbols are commonly the hammer and armor, the dove. He thinks before he acts, leads his siblings towards the right path. Clerics revere him, as his power provides healing for all, healing and peace. If anyone wishes for peace, they pray to him alone. Ever since Yursarsh turned on the gods, he has been the interim God of Gods, managing the tasks all gods must do. Must cause a lot of strain on him, as more and more people who claim to see his visage say that he's sprouting silver hairs. Oh, before I forget, the race that he represents are the Fairies, small in size but supposedly pure of heart and more... logical than most. I think they're rather boring, but that's a tale for another day!
His counterpart is Ursula, Goddess of Darkness. Most fear her and damn her name just based on the fact that they associate darkness with evil. Whatever they say, though, it's not true. Darkness is uncertainty, chaos, ethos. Wisdom is what she represents. She despises those who do not change with the times, those who remain stagnent. "What fun is life if it's all the same all the time?" she tends to ask. If her brother represents the mind, she represents the heart, ever changing with the situation. Not many people worship her aside from her patron race, the Tieflings, and mages such as myself, who strive for that wisdom she seeks. Her common symbols, if you are lucky to even find one, are the tome and the raven.
Patron god of the Undines is Eriel, Goddess of Water. She governs the calm streams, the bubbling brooks, the high tides. She stands for the calm thoughts, purity, health, kindness, and mystery. She could be as bubbly as a brook, as cold as a block of ice, or as flighty as steam. Moody as she is, she is also worshiped by priests, as water she creates is claimed to be able to purify any ailment and sear the undead. She is also representative of strength and calamity, as huge tides are capable of tearing down a town all on its own, all signs of life lost into the deep, eternal blue. The trident is her symbol and her weapon of choice. I guess you could get away with a water drop being a symbol, but there are hundreds of water gods that try to lay claim to that symbol for their own.
With water comes fire, and Axanon, God of Fire, is Eriel's counterpart. Passion of all kinds is what he stands for. War. Warmth. Destruction. Purification. When war is inevitible, one prays to him for victory and honor before heading to the battlefield. The blade, flames, and scales of dragons are commonly seen as symbols for him, and statues of him holding Excalibur in his claws are usually found in castles. Fire is hard to put out, isn't it? Not even water can completely douse the fiery passions in one's heart. Axanon believes in following your passions, no matter what they may be, to the very end. Share them with the very world. However, his fiercer side demands that those of foul nature be set aflame until nothing but ashes remain, to purify the evils that plague the world at hand. He is as gentle as a flickering candle flame when needed, or as fierce as a forest fire. He is the patron god of Dragons, even if most have evolved to do things other than breathe flames as he does. He is also my patron god...
Oh dear, please don't look at my burned hands like that. It makes me nervous! I-I had problems once, okay? Er, um, if you can stop staring...
A-anyway! Next is the god of wind, Zephyrus. Or, as most call him, Zephyr. He's a flighty one, and he represents the spirit, speed, the spreading of knowledge, and change. While Ursula represents change as well, hers is more gradual change, while Zephyr represents rapid, sudden change. What might be a gentle breeze can turn into a whirlwind in an instant, yes? He only wishes for people to be lively, spread the news, and, of course, not fear change. Recently, though, he has also tacked on for people to be courageous in the face of danger and not back down, and don't let anything hold you back from adventure. Harpies, the race he created, follow that creed to their deathbed, soaring the skies and exploring every nook and cranny. His symbol? He never decided on a symbol. Claims he's above that sort of thing, I suppose...
Finally, we have Terra, Goddess of Earth. Stubborn one and quirky, compared to her fellow gods. Her patron races are the Humans and the Giants. She represents... well, I suppose you could say she, too, represents life. After all, isn't the ground we stand on her doing? Anyway, she stands for the seasons, the fertility of crops, the physical, stability and honesty. Common symbols are the bull, mountains, or trees. All life is precious to her, but life isn't so fragile that she watches over it. "People of all sorts are stubborn bastards," she once claimed. "Not even death can stand in their way." People associate her with tradition as well, as some things, according to them, should not be changed at all. She believes that those that look upon her do their best to deal with the harsh world and perservere through the "winter" of their lives, and "stick to what you know best."
I did mention a seventh one, but... His story is long. VERY long. And I kind of dropped a meteor on him. That, my friend, is for another time.
Speaking of time, we seem to be out of time, judging by how you're standing up and getting ready to go. Do drop by again, and send a warning so I can prepare some tea. Perhaps we can talk more about books and all...
Oh, wondering about the tiny knight? Um... I rather not speak of him right now. Maybe later. Our history goes way back, and its...complicated. Til next time!
Tuesday, January 14, 2014
Harpin on: Bravely Default Demo
I have to admit, I'm an RPG girl. Why else would you see me play MMOs and Final Fantasy all the time? I've been through all the horrible aspects of grinding, changing my job classes just so I can pass a certain boss, getting enough gold from sidequests to buy the best weapons available, and beatting them all in a week's time and then some. I'm looking at you, Persona 4: Golden.
So when I started playing the demo yesterday, I got hyped as hell. Bravely Default is essentially the lovechild between FF3 and FF5, where you can freely change your job classes, have multiple abilities, and hit multiple times without penalty. Of course, it comes with its own twists: Defending (or Defaulting on your turn) stockpiles Brave Points, which are essentially points you use to act. You can have up to 3 so you can attack 4 times. (You can no longer act when your BP is in the negatives, but you always recover 1 BP after a turn.) Defend when you can't do shit, hammer down on enemies by using Brave to attack more than once. There's a catch, though: Enemies can do the same thing.
I can't say there's a story to the demo, as all it has are quests from villagers. Fetch quests, enemy defeating quests, yadda yadda. Job Levels are also capped at lvl 4. Sucks, but its a demo, right? And there are a ton of classes to use, so you can mix and match whatever abilities and support abilities you want to make your party truly unique and fit your playstyle. Mine, right now, happens to be a Swordmaster, a Performer, a Ninja (DUAL WEILDIN SPEARS, DON'T ASK HOW), and a Red Mage.
Graphics are stunning, there's a fairy which reminds me of a certain fairy from Dragon Quest IX (STELLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA), there's enough to do to keep you on your toes, you can build up a town to get better items and equipment (and use streetpass to get more villagers to help build it up faster), etc. etc. The more you do, the more item packages you get, and who doesn't like free items? (If you say "no", I think you're in denial. I saw you take free ice cream samples at the store the other day!)
However, with all good things come a catch. As an JRPG, it suffers from the same problem all JRPGs do: GRINDING. Grinding is essential for levels and money and JP. You will be doing a lot of it. To lessen the pain of it, you can fast forward through the action-y sections of them using the control pad. You can also pause them using the control pad, if you are desperate to get the perfect screenshot of a white mage taking out a flying demon.
Second, there are enemies that can and will multiply, given the chance. Those without a proper strategy will get promptly stuck in a neverending loop of scorpions and mushrooms, which can get really annoying, really fast. I tend to stockpile on BP on everybody, then go all out, but not everybody would like to do that.
Third...the demo is not a full representation of the full game. Not even close. Hell, the entire scenario, aside from building up a town in the meantime, is not going to be in the full game. Certain items, workers from your town, and friend summons(oh yeah forgot to mention that) will transfer into the full game. Levels, job levels, and other things will not, probably because what fun is a game when you're already overleveled from the demo?
Now, Friend Summons. If you have a friend registered and you streetpass them, their characters can be summoned in game for one extra BP in battle. They'll be using the most powerful move they set and that means things will die. Hard. I can see how this will be abused (can you imagine? A measly lvl 1 Tir summoning a lvl 99 Agnes that uses the equivalent of Ultima? fucking OP ), but what can ya do? Internet options will be added into the full game, which means that I will promptly ask Gooper to give me his Sarah powers so I can fucking heal everybody with Curaga without spending any MP kthx. (To those people who don't know of Gooper Blooper and read my blog, he's a good friend of mine who also has a fondness for Final Fantasy and has a happy white mage named Sarah in most of his stories. go look for his blog, he write good)
I highly recommend anyone with some spare time or enough sanity to bear with the flaws of a JRPG to pick up Bravely Default's demo from the eShop, and/or eagerly await the actual game, to be released on February 7th, 2014.
To end this, I must ask you call to go look up the Male Performers of the game and look at how much swagger they give off. Those shaaades.
So when I started playing the demo yesterday, I got hyped as hell. Bravely Default is essentially the lovechild between FF3 and FF5, where you can freely change your job classes, have multiple abilities, and hit multiple times without penalty. Of course, it comes with its own twists: Defending (or Defaulting on your turn) stockpiles Brave Points, which are essentially points you use to act. You can have up to 3 so you can attack 4 times. (You can no longer act when your BP is in the negatives, but you always recover 1 BP after a turn.) Defend when you can't do shit, hammer down on enemies by using Brave to attack more than once. There's a catch, though: Enemies can do the same thing.
I can't say there's a story to the demo, as all it has are quests from villagers. Fetch quests, enemy defeating quests, yadda yadda. Job Levels are also capped at lvl 4. Sucks, but its a demo, right? And there are a ton of classes to use, so you can mix and match whatever abilities and support abilities you want to make your party truly unique and fit your playstyle. Mine, right now, happens to be a Swordmaster, a Performer, a Ninja (DUAL WEILDIN SPEARS, DON'T ASK HOW), and a Red Mage.
Graphics are stunning, there's a fairy which reminds me of a certain fairy from Dragon Quest IX (STELLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA), there's enough to do to keep you on your toes, you can build up a town to get better items and equipment (and use streetpass to get more villagers to help build it up faster), etc. etc. The more you do, the more item packages you get, and who doesn't like free items? (If you say "no", I think you're in denial. I saw you take free ice cream samples at the store the other day!)
However, with all good things come a catch. As an JRPG, it suffers from the same problem all JRPGs do: GRINDING. Grinding is essential for levels and money and JP. You will be doing a lot of it. To lessen the pain of it, you can fast forward through the action-y sections of them using the control pad. You can also pause them using the control pad, if you are desperate to get the perfect screenshot of a white mage taking out a flying demon.
Second, there are enemies that can and will multiply, given the chance. Those without a proper strategy will get promptly stuck in a neverending loop of scorpions and mushrooms, which can get really annoying, really fast. I tend to stockpile on BP on everybody, then go all out, but not everybody would like to do that.
Third...the demo is not a full representation of the full game. Not even close. Hell, the entire scenario, aside from building up a town in the meantime, is not going to be in the full game. Certain items, workers from your town, and friend summons(oh yeah forgot to mention that) will transfer into the full game. Levels, job levels, and other things will not, probably because what fun is a game when you're already overleveled from the demo?
Now, Friend Summons. If you have a friend registered and you streetpass them, their characters can be summoned in game for one extra BP in battle. They'll be using the most powerful move they set and that means things will die. Hard. I can see how this will be abused (can you imagine? A measly lvl 1 Tir summoning a lvl 99 Agnes that uses the equivalent of Ultima? fucking OP ), but what can ya do? Internet options will be added into the full game, which means that I will promptly ask Gooper to give me his Sarah powers so I can fucking heal everybody with Curaga without spending any MP kthx. (To those people who don't know of Gooper Blooper and read my blog, he's a good friend of mine who also has a fondness for Final Fantasy and has a happy white mage named Sarah in most of his stories. go look for his blog, he write good)
I highly recommend anyone with some spare time or enough sanity to bear with the flaws of a JRPG to pick up Bravely Default's demo from the eShop, and/or eagerly await the actual game, to be released on February 7th, 2014.
To end this, I must ask you call to go look up the Male Performers of the game and look at how much swagger they give off. Those shaaades.
Saturday, January 11, 2014
Nostalgia Time: Super Mario RPG
Modern games are all the rage these days. Call of Duty? We're all on that shit. New Zelda? Call the presses! New Ace Attorney game that isn't Japan Only? SOUND THE ALARMS! Graphics have improved tremendously. Gameplay has evolved with the times. Hell, now people are getting into this storytelling aspect in all genres instead of just RPGs! Its truly amazing what technology can do, if we can test their absolute limits.
Sometimes, though, you just gotta go back down to the root. Where would we be without the Atari or the NES? Sure, I bet most modern day players can't sit down for a game with drastically lower graphics standards ("8 bit? Seriously? LAAAAAAAAME" ) and gameplay standards. Or games that don't actually tell you what to do, they let you dick around and find out yourself. ("But maaa, I want my hand held!" ) But as someone whonever played an actual NES or Atari game was born in good ol' '93, the era of the best system to ever exist Super Nintendo Entertainment System (or the Super Famicom in the Land of the Rising Sun), I kind of get tired of the Sony-Microsoft-Nintendo slapfight and newer systems and long for days of old. Where instead it was Sega and Nintendo fighting it out.
For a second, take a look at all those Mario RPG games. Two separate series run together: Paper Mario (with the most recent version being Sticker Star) and Mario and Luigi (with Dream Team). Paper Mario boasts the cutesy, 2D artstyle and introduced the Badge system, where you can do more than jump and hammer your way through enemies. They also had the partner system, where Mario had help in the form of 7 partners, all with unique movesets and abilities that could be used to solve puzzles outside of the battlefield. Mario and Luigi features Mario and his leaner brother, Luigi. That particular series focuses more on using well-timed team attacks to wear bosses down, as well as squishing the hell out of your brother with a hammer to get through some puzzles. Both bros were unique in one way or another (Luigi rocks his stashe, compared to Mario), and, occasionally, had their own special attacks! (Firebrand and Thunderhand, anyone? No? )
Both share the fabled "Timed Hits", where pressing the A (or B) button just before you hit an enemy (or an enemy hits you) dishes out (or lessens) the amount of damage you give (or take). They mix it all up in one way or another, but that one common link begs the question: Where did it even originate?
Enough stalling. Say hello to the grandpappy of all ya'lls favorite Mario RPGs!
Call me incredibly biased. To be honest, I am. I just recently completed a successful No-Armor run of this game. Not only that, it was one of the very first games I learned about from my elder brother. Ah, yes, just going up to the attic of an old house to find my brother playing this on the ZSNES, just when its revealed that a certain someone is NOT A FROG! (Say WHAT?)
This game is what started the timed hits sensation and led Nintendo into thinking that doing this again without Square's help in the form of Paper Mario was a great idea. It had all you ever wanted: Active gameplay, decent graphics, a story about a poor plumber who got wrapped up into repairing a Star Street or whatever... The works. Square Enix (or just Square at the time) helped out, and even left a little cameo for us.The whole world of SMRPG is huge, full of colorful characters that you're bound to remember in one way or another.
All RPGs are about strategy, and SMRPG was no exception. Each enemy has strengths and weaknesses, yadda yadda. But you were never left wishing for an auto-battle, like in Final Fantasy, where you just input commands and just sit back and watch the fireworks. Oh no. You better time your attacks right if you want that annoying enemy to go down in one (or two or more) hits before he unleashes an attack you can't counter. Died and you don't have Peach yet? Should have stocked up on Pick Me Ups! Your inventory is limited to 29 slots, you don't get much HP OR many levels to begin with (255 is the cap for HP; 30 is the level limit. There is only ONE character who might even get close to 255 HP, but we'll get there in due time.), so you better plan ahead! (and time those Group Hugs right, goddamn it)
No game is without its flaws, though. It was all more noticible when I had to start paying attention to what bonus stats (like in Paper Mario and Mario and Luigi) I had to give to my characters. You see, I was doing a No Armor run, where all I had to rely on was my weapons and my accessories. I had to time my guards just right, because if I didn't, someone was bound to hit the floor.
Except that, well, in said run, I didn't struggle in the first 3/4ths of the game. Sure, some bosses made me waste a Pick Me Up or two, but even without armor, they were a joke. And if they were a joke without armor, imagine it without armor. Overrall, the game is pretty easy once you get the hang of things, so self-imposed challenges for it end up being the norm. The game is also oddly balanced, as the token white mage, Peach, ends up having more attack power than the token Black Mage (which you get so much earlier), Mallow. Geno, much like his creator Gaz (and possibly..Square?) said, is an overpowered shithead who has two specials you ever really need him to do: Geno Boost (BOOSTS ALL STATS OMG) and Geno Whirl (which makes a complete joke out of Exor).
All in all, though? Even through all easy peasy-ness and laughing at how pathetic I made some bosses look, I throughly enjoyed the game again, like a child after he rediscovers his favorite toy. I found some things that I never discovered before as a child (and teenager), which amazes me to this day. I still haven't done 99 Super Jumps or got all the hidden treasures, but all in due time, right? Warrants another playthrough, at least!
I can't give a fair rating, due to how I finished the game again recently. That'll have to simmer down before I can. I can, though, give a rating to the No Armor challenge...
10/10, would do again. Smithy actually felt like more of a final boss with his stupidly huge amounts of HP. I think it took me the better part of an hour to beat him with no armor. And there were several bosses in the late game that gave me trouble. Oh yes, I'd do it again in a heartbeat, if only to experience that thrill of saying "OH JESUS FUCK HE KILLED MALLOW"
Many fucks were given this run. Trust me.
NOW ITS TIME TO TALK ABOUT THE CAST! Skip this if you just want to learn more about the biggest troublemakers in my No Armor run.
MARIO, the BIG FUCKING HERO: You know what he looks like, he's right there on the box! Bah, whatever.
Up on top are the base stats, below are modified stats due to weapons and accesories. Mario's attack power doesn't seem much at first, but equip him with an Ultra Hammer (or, in my case, a Lazy Shell) and enemies don't even stand a chance. They look into his eyes and see death. Maybe pasta, too. Mario is pretty hungry.
MALLOW, WHO IS NOT A TADPOLE (Oh noooo):
"My name is *HEART STAR SQUARE NOTE*, but that's hard to pronounce, so you may call me Geno, after the doll."
Bowser probably just stripped her of all her equipment before tossing her in a cage
Endgame Stats:
now to wait for SMRPG's romhack to be updated, then you can watch me suffer
Sometimes, though, you just gotta go back down to the root. Where would we be without the Atari or the NES? Sure, I bet most modern day players can't sit down for a game with drastically lower graphics standards ("8 bit? Seriously? LAAAAAAAAME" ) and gameplay standards. Or games that don't actually tell you what to do, they let you dick around and find out yourself. ("But maaa, I want my hand held!" ) But as someone who
For a second, take a look at all those Mario RPG games. Two separate series run together: Paper Mario (with the most recent version being Sticker Star) and Mario and Luigi (with Dream Team). Paper Mario boasts the cutesy, 2D artstyle and introduced the Badge system, where you can do more than jump and hammer your way through enemies. They also had the partner system, where Mario had help in the form of 7 partners, all with unique movesets and abilities that could be used to solve puzzles outside of the battlefield. Mario and Luigi features Mario and his leaner brother, Luigi. That particular series focuses more on using well-timed team attacks to wear bosses down, as well as squishing the hell out of your brother with a hammer to get through some puzzles. Both bros were unique in one way or another (Luigi rocks his stashe, compared to Mario), and, occasionally, had their own special attacks! (Firebrand and Thunderhand, anyone? No? )
Both share the fabled "Timed Hits", where pressing the A (or B) button just before you hit an enemy (or an enemy hits you) dishes out (or lessens) the amount of damage you give (or take). They mix it all up in one way or another, but that one common link begs the question: Where did it even originate?
Enough stalling. Say hello to the grandpappy of all ya'lls favorite Mario RPGs!
Call me incredibly biased. To be honest, I am. I just recently completed a successful No-Armor run of this game. Not only that, it was one of the very first games I learned about from my elder brother. Ah, yes, just going up to the attic of an old house to find my brother playing this on the ZSNES, just when its revealed that a certain someone is NOT A FROG! (Say WHAT?)
This game is what started the timed hits sensation and led Nintendo into thinking that doing this again without Square's help in the form of Paper Mario was a great idea. It had all you ever wanted: Active gameplay, decent graphics, a story about a poor plumber who got wrapped up into repairing a Star Street or whatever... The works. Square Enix (or just Square at the time) helped out, and even left a little cameo for us.The whole world of SMRPG is huge, full of colorful characters that you're bound to remember in one way or another.
All RPGs are about strategy, and SMRPG was no exception. Each enemy has strengths and weaknesses, yadda yadda. But you were never left wishing for an auto-battle, like in Final Fantasy, where you just input commands and just sit back and watch the fireworks. Oh no. You better time your attacks right if you want that annoying enemy to go down in one (or two or more) hits before he unleashes an attack you can't counter. Died and you don't have Peach yet? Should have stocked up on Pick Me Ups! Your inventory is limited to 29 slots, you don't get much HP OR many levels to begin with (255 is the cap for HP; 30 is the level limit. There is only ONE character who might even get close to 255 HP, but we'll get there in due time.), so you better plan ahead! (and time those Group Hugs right, goddamn it)
No game is without its flaws, though. It was all more noticible when I had to start paying attention to what bonus stats (like in Paper Mario and Mario and Luigi) I had to give to my characters. You see, I was doing a No Armor run, where all I had to rely on was my weapons and my accessories. I had to time my guards just right, because if I didn't, someone was bound to hit the floor.
Except that, well, in said run, I didn't struggle in the first 3/4ths of the game. Sure, some bosses made me waste a Pick Me Up or two, but even without armor, they were a joke. And if they were a joke without armor, imagine it without armor. Overrall, the game is pretty easy once you get the hang of things, so self-imposed challenges for it end up being the norm. The game is also oddly balanced, as the token white mage, Peach, ends up having more attack power than the token Black Mage (which you get so much earlier), Mallow. Geno, much like his creator Gaz (and possibly..Square?) said, is an overpowered shithead who has two specials you ever really need him to do: Geno Boost (BOOSTS ALL STATS OMG) and Geno Whirl (which makes a complete joke out of Exor).
All in all, though? Even through all easy peasy-ness and laughing at how pathetic I made some bosses look, I throughly enjoyed the game again, like a child after he rediscovers his favorite toy. I found some things that I never discovered before as a child (and teenager), which amazes me to this day. I still haven't done 99 Super Jumps or got all the hidden treasures, but all in due time, right? Warrants another playthrough, at least!
I can't give a fair rating, due to how I finished the game again recently. That'll have to simmer down before I can. I can, though, give a rating to the No Armor challenge...
10/10, would do again. Smithy actually felt like more of a final boss with his stupidly huge amounts of HP. I think it took me the better part of an hour to beat him with no armor. And there were several bosses in the late game that gave me trouble. Oh yes, I'd do it again in a heartbeat, if only to experience that thrill of saying "OH JESUS FUCK HE KILLED MALLOW"
Many fucks were given this run. Trust me.
NOW ITS TIME TO TALK ABOUT THE CAST! Skip this if you just want to learn more about the biggest troublemakers in my No Armor run.
MARIO, the BIG FUCKING HERO: You know what he looks like, he's right there on the box! Bah, whatever.
"Its-a me, Mario!"
Mario's the star of this RPG, and he won't let you forget it. He's well balanced and packs a punch in battle. With his mighty Jumps (which apparently warrent their own element) and Fireballs, no enemies can stand in his way and live to tell the tale. His Magic Defense is kind of shit, but he makes up for it with plenty of normal defense and attack power.
For a character who can't talk, he's pretty expressive, too! Not even 20 minutes into the game and you see him playing Charades like a pro. He can even do a pretty good Exor impression! Some of his dialog options are hillarious, too. I'll be sure to show those off in my Let's Play of the game. (Which is another reason why I can't fairly judge this game at the moment. Derp.)
Here are his stats at end-game levels in my No Armor run:
Pictured: The destroyer of matter and antimatter himself.
MALLOW, WHO IS NOT A TADPOLE (Oh noooo):
"Who do think you are, Bruce Lee? We can't go in fists ablazing!"
Mallow is the first party member you recruit, after a mobster dinosaur stole his Frog Coin. His specialty doesn't lie in in his attack power, but rather in his Magic Attack. He is the Black Mage (or is it Red Mage?) of the group, capable of dealing both single target and multi-target damage. As he's actually a Cloud, most of his attacks are based off of the weather, such as Thunderbolt and Snowy. I guess Star Rain counts too, if you consider Meteor Showers to be part of it. He can heal, he can show enemy HP, he can do damage... What's not to love about him? Zero. He was my go-to guy throughout the entire game because of his versitility. Sure, his defense and attack leave a lot to be desired, but I don't care, I LOVE MY MAGES. BRING MALLOW BACK GODDAMN IT
Sadly, much as I love him, I can understand why some players decide to ignore him and instead go for a different party. But before I go into that, endgame stats!
He's a bit on the slow side, so he'll usually get his turn last, but man. Look at that Magic Attack! That Magic Defense! He's a true mage, through and through. Nevermind the fact that it doesn't get a boost like Attack does (As far as I know, there are no weapons and/or armor and accessories that boost Mg. Attack), he will go straight out Thor on your ass if you're not careful. And HP Rain is the strongest single target healing there is. Hell. yeah.
But enough about him, lets introduce the person everybody would like to see somewhere else but never will.
GENO, SQUARE'S POSTER CHILD:
"My name is *HEART STAR SQUARE NOTE*, but that's hard to pronounce, so you may call me Geno, after the doll."
Ugh. I'll be honest with you: I don't like Geno. No, its not because of his character. His character is fine, just straight laced like a protector of the Star Road should be. Its not because of his looks, because eeeh. No, the reason I hate him is because he gets insane stat boosts per level, moreso than any other character in the game. His growths are all over the place. He has insane power, enough to rival Mario and Bowser. THIS is the character most people use to cheese out Exor and hard enemies, because with perfect timing, Geno Whirl does 9999 damage.
Think about that. No other special in the game, not even boss specials, even come close to this damage cap. No boss even has that much HP. This guy, if there wasn't a limit placed on him, could probably solve the crisis on his own by tearing each and every enemy straight in half. Coupled with Geno Boost, which boosts all stats aside from Speed with perfect timing, he is an absolute terror to any and all he meets.
Which is exactly why I banned him in my No Armor run and my Let's Play. He is simply too overpowered. I can't just let myself use something that makes the game easier than it already is. If other people want to use him, fine! He's definitely a powerhouse in all aspects. Hell, he might even be essential for Low Level Runs and Speedruns. What do I know? But because he makes a complete joke out of Mallow due to his high stats overrall (and maybe Bowser, too), I just couldn't bring myself to use him.
TL;DR: Geno is an overpowered shit and baaaw he makes Mallow look like a joke. I'm pretty sure he's a god trapped in a doll's form.
Endgame stats:
See? His Attack rivals Mario's. His base attack is even HIGHER than Mario's. And he has 239 HP, compared to everybody else. Everybody else has lower than 200 HP.
Geno's the only one who will possibly even get close to the HP cap. This is not helped by the fact that I put in all the bonus stats in HP for him, as it would be pointless to put it in anything else when I'm not using him.
He'll probably hit it around lvl 27, I'll check. Maybe.
Next up...
BOWSER, WHO MUST HAVE DRANK A LOT OF BOOZE TO BE THIS CHILL:
"I'm lightning in a bottle! I'm an earthquake in a can!"
or
"Like the sun over
the moon, my brain and power
are lost to these fools."
Bowser's another favorite. Its probably enhanced by how cool he was in Bowser's Inside Story, but guess what started it? SUPER MARIO RPG, RESPECT. Or don't? I dunno. He lacks in the magic department (he only gets 4 spells total, which is sad), but he makes for it with massive defense, massive HP, and great attack power. He will gladly terrify you and rip you apart from the seams! Hell, he's the sole reason Johnathan Jones, in the sunken pirate ship, was a complete joke. His spells concentrate more on status effects, such as Fear (lowers attack and defensive power) and Poison, but that's more than enough to leave enemies in the dust.
Everybody seems to ignore him, though. Not players, but the characters. He broke down a door for you, Mario! Thank him, dammit! He also gets his keep stolen and has a hard time comprehending stuff about the Star Road. He might be a bit of a dolt, but who gives a shit? Bowser time, baby! He scares off his own minions and confuses them! He crushes enemies underneath his foot! He is Bowser, King of Koopas, and this world is HIS! (or so he thinks)
Endgame stats:
I take that back, Mallow's the second slowest character. Bowser's a slow tank. Literally. Sadly, while his base attack fucks over Mario and Geno, their weapons are much better than his Spiked Link. Maybe if I had gotten the Drill Claw instead of Rock Candy...
Oh yeah, wasn't there a last person?
PRINCESS PEACH TOADSTOOL, THE ULTIMATE HEALER:
"I-I'm not scared of you! I have Mario by my side!"
Keep telling yourself that, Peach. Keep telling yourself that.
Peach is clearly what white mages aspire to be: The best. Group Hug and Therapy removes status effects and heals for a significant amount. She learns the only revival spell in the game, which will save you inventory space if you have her on your team. A breeze can make her keel over, but by god, she will hug you until you are okay again. She also learns status causing effects, which could be more useful if more bosses could be affected by them. Also Psyche Bomb, but who needs that when you have Mallow?
There is one way to make her essentially invincible, though... and that is this setup: Frying Pan (gotten as a Metal Plate from a Toad in Moleville for 300 coins), Lazy Shell, Safety Ring. Frying Pan lets her do significant damage (for a white mage). Lazy shell negates essentally all physical damage and some magical damage. Safety Ring makes her immune to status effects, OHKOs, Fire, Lightning, AND Water based spells.
Peach doesn't take shit from nobody. Other than that, she's still the innocent, naive princess we all know she is. Although her performance here and in the SSB games leaves us to wonder... if she has that much potential, why doesn't she just fuck Bowser up?
Endgame Stats:
Well, uh... oh. I should have leveled her. (I had just finished fighting Culex after this, WHY DIDN'T YOU LEVEL THEN? )
hold on a sec
Better. Yeah, her attack is beyond even Bowser's, which is insane. Why would you balance it so that Peach's endgame weapon is much more powerful than Bowser's penultimate tier weapon? WHY IS SHE MORE POWERFUL THAN MALLOW, WHO YOU HAD ALL GAME? WHAT.
Her Magic attack rival's Mallow's, as it should. Her Magic Defense is also pretty good, too. Defense is still shit, though, so try not to toss her in a fight full of hard hitters.
Skipped all that to see who gave me the most trouble? Good thinking. Remember, though, this is from a NO-ARMOR run. It may be less hard or harder, depending on what kind of challenge you are imposing on yourself (or if you have a challenge at all).
BELDUM, PART DEUX: He's the first boss that really gave me a run for my money. I forgot to put on Wake Up Pins, which prevents whoever is equipped with it immunity to sleep. Everybody fell asleep, leaving them entirely vulnerable to attacks by two Mallow clones more than willing to dish out major pain. I salvaged it (thank god for Pick Me Ups and Mallow's high magic def), but that was only a taste of what was to come...
AXEM RANGERS: They gave me my first game over. MY FIRST ONE. MY PERFECT RECORD, TARNISHED! That was mostly my fault, though, as I took a risk and used Psyche Bomb on all of them. Unfortunately, three of those rangers counter attack specials, so Peach was as good as toast. Once she was gone, the entire team tore through Mario and Bowser like butter. Fuck. My second run went so much better without the counter attacks, to nobody's surprise.
EXOR: No Geno Whirl, here! Had to bring Peach, as he had plenty of multi-target specials that Mario and Mallow have trouble surviving. (Corona comes to mind, but that might be me being biased because of a certain boss.) Even then, she had trouble surviving herself, due to the Left Eye's physical attacks. I had no time to waste on killing everything. More time wasted, the longer the battle would be in trying to take out Exor. It took me about 5 tries before I actually managed to get a good strategy for taking him down.
SMITHY (both forms): Oh, christ, where do I even begin? He actually felt like a final boss. He created minions that were dealing enough damage that if I didn't heal up, I was screwed the next turn. All of his attacks bypassed Peach's Safety Ring. He knew how to use the most powerful spell in the game, Meteor Shower. (Or was it Meteor Storm? The one with colorful stars, mind) If that wasn't enough, his true form was nailing with powerful physicals and devastating non-elemental spells. The body had to be taken out first, while I had to whittle away at his HP in either his Defense form or Mage form. It took the better part of an hour to actually break down his massive 7000 HP to nothing, finished off by Mallow's Sonic Cymbals. That fight alone made me use up more of my Pick Me Ups than I ever thought I'd ever have to use. And I would gladly do it again for that massive thrill of...what was that? A challenge!
CULEX: Square's cameo from Final Fantasy II. He is matter. He is antimatter. He consumes time, yadda yadda.
Fuck this guy. I once tried fighting him as a kid, and I bombed. Pretty hard. I never faught him again, afraid to take him on with his posse of crystals. Seriously, those crystals will fuck your shit up, and not even Red Essences will save you for long. (Thanks, Shredder!)
I really wanted to record myself fucking him over, but two things got in the way: One, I had no idea how much HP he had, so I had to use a stats-only guide to figure out a strategy. Seeing how I never learned much about him, I had to give myself some advantage. Second, a certain Cornwind Evil was talking to me on skype about the No Armor run. Afraid that someone else might contact me out of the blue, I stopped recording.
Then the magic happened and I didn't catch it on tape. Sorry dudes.
ANYWAY, Culex is harder in that most of his attacks are unblockable. You can't do jack shit against magic. Mario, Peach, and Mallow carried me through, although Mario and Mallow kept falling like flies. Peach kept the entire team together, as she had the almighty Safety Ring, which protected her from 3/5 different attacks from all angles. Group heal. Frying pan when she has time. Whenever Mallow was up, he used Star Rain (as the Wind Crystal has stupidly low HP but stupidly high defense) to weaken everybody, Shocker to take down the Earth Crystal, Snowy to take care of everything (specifically the Fire Crystal), HP rain to heal up, or just use a Royal Syrup. Mario was either healing or doing damage.
The Earth Crystal (due to its attacks that couldn't be negated with the Safety Ring) and Fire Crystal (130-150 DAMAGE USING GODDAMN CORONA, FUCK THAT GUY) were the biggest issues, but I had to take out the weaker crystals before I had a shot. Once all the crystals were down, though, Culex was easy pickings.
So yeah. Mario essentially defeated Matter and Antimatter all in one. Mario's pretty proud of that.
And with that, this review comes to an end. If anybody has any questions about different things about my run(s), I'm available on skype (or just leave a comment).
Tuesday, January 7, 2014
World's Dilemma
For someone who had just escaped jaws of death, Juan was rather relieved to be in the dank, gloomy, smelly Netherworld. Ah, the hard, cold feel of blue stones beneath his feet! The water rushing down the River Styx! The smell of... well, he couldn't describe it, but it was familiar, at least! While he was enjoying his return, though, his heart raced, almost too fast for someone. Almost like he was... afraid?
He turned his head towards little Shiela, shivering and desperately trying to keep the stink out of her nose. White wisps surrounded her, enveloping her. Juan wasn't sure whether to comfort her through holding her hand or talking to her. Taking her to the Netherworld might have confirmed the idea that he was a God of Death.
With no other choice, he looked Shiela in the eyes and said, "I know this is scary. You really are in the Netherworld, just like how they talk about in the storybooks."
"Then you lied," Shiela replied, turning away. "You're a big, fat liar."
"You're still alive and I intend on keeping it that way, though. A God of Death would just rip your soul out and be done with it."
"But you didn't tell me you were taking me here!"
"Had no time to. Besides, if I told you that, you'd either brush it off like a joke or be too scared to come along."
"But now I'm gonna be-"
"-taken to be judged and sent to hell or something?" Shiela glared at him as he chuckled. "Oh, no. I'm just taking you to a different part of the Netherworld. The queen herself would like to see you. All part of a plan, and none of it involves you coming to harm." Still glaring, was she? At least the wisps around her died down. Now to deal with her fear once and for all. "I pinky promise that nothing bad's gonna happen to you, okay? And if I break it, toss me into the River Lethe or something."
Juan held out his pinky for her, taking his sweet time. Shiela thought about it for a little bit before wrapping her tiny pinky around his. "Promise!" she said cheerfully, smiling so wide, it was a wonder that she was scared to begin with. It didn't last too long, as she held her nose to keep out the foul smell. "Does it stink like this everywhere here?" she asked.
"I'd be worried if it did," Juan replied. He dug into his pockets for two gold pieces, then stood by the river and waved. He could feel a pang of excitement as a boat seemingly rowed itself over to the shore, nobody in sight. "Guess Charon's taking a break," he said with a shrug before getting in, leaving his two gold at the bottom before helping Jasper and Shiela inside. With all guests accounted for, the boat rowed down the river, leaving Juan to relax and stretch.
Juan was starting to relax when Shiela poked at him and frowned. "Its kinda boring," she said, crossing her arms and puffing up her little cheeks. "Can you tell me a story? Mama used to tell me stories aaaall the time!"
Uh oh. He had to compete with mom? "I can't promise the story I tell will have a happy ending-"
"STORYTIME!" Did Shiela just ignore everything aside from "story"? Juan hoped she didn't, but her smile and all her clapping pointed otherwise.
"Guess its time to get on with it," he said to himself before taking a deep breath. "Long, long ago, there were seven gods: Yursarsh, God of Gods... Yuran, God of Light.... Ursula, Goddess of Darkness.. Axanon and Eriel, God of Fire and Goddess of Water... and Zephyr and Terra, God of Wind and Goddess of Earth. They all came from the Elder God Bauriel, who had died and left the job of making a whole new universe to them. They all worked together to do so, and that's how our planet came to be.
Yursarsh led his siblings, as his dad trusted him to take care of the world they brought. He was a bit rash sometimes and a giant glutton, but nothing was bigger than his curiosity. He liked learning about the world and seeing what happens. He paid quite a few visits to Ursula's library up in Heaven. The siblings knew that they couldn't afford to lose him, so they cast a spell to make him impervious to attacks by other gods, in case they became greedy for power.
Didn't work out too well, though, as he found out about one of Ursula's favorite book. It's said that anyone aside from her who read it would be driven insane from how much information they soak in about the past, present, and future."
Shiela stared. "Wow, that's a lot of information! But its Yursarsh, right? He can take it!"
A sigh dampened her smile in an instant. "Not even he can get away with reading it with his mind intact," Juan said bluntly. "And of course, when Ursula told him not to, he did it anyway. He went rampant and, well... It's said that he transformed into a giant shark and started devouring Heaven like cotton candy. None of the greater or lesser gods could do anything about him, so they banished him to the world below. And like a big baby that lost a game, he went like a spoilsport and started devouring the continents below.
The gods knew they couldn't do anything directly, so they tried to help the mortals below to combat him. Unfortunately, before he was sealed away, he devoured all the continents aside from Levia. Not sure if it was because the gods couldn't get to the continents in time or if they did, but the heroes did a bad job at stopping him. That'll probably be lost to history...
Anyway, he was sealed here, as our heroes were pretty old. Back problems, hip problems, the works. Since they didn't have the power to stop him, they sealed him away and hoped that by the time the seal broke, an actual party of heroes would be ready to stop him and his minions."
"And there was, right?!" Shiela asked, almost bouncing in her seat. Jasper wasn't too pleased by all the boat rocking, whimpering as water splashed in.
Juan thought for a moment as he sent the water back into the river using his magic. Once he spoke again, even Shiela could tell he was disappointed.
"There was, but... Well... Ugh, its complicated. Yeah, there were a party of heroes that rose up to the challenge once Yursarsh's minions began finding a way to break the seal and throw the continent into chaos while they were at it. Alexander Triden led them, a little knight from Sevalia, no older than 20. His companions were Xavier, a powerful mage who is probably one of those old heroes' great-great-great-great-great...something something grandson, Sarah, a powerful cleric with an equally powerful family, a barbarianess named Garnet, an orator named...Well, in the books, they call her Stel-Stel. I have no clue why... Fanboys? Oh, and there was a bard named Chuck, too! They all worked together to try to stop the chaos wrought by the minions, with mighty Excalibur by their side. Sure, the seal got broken, but even Yursarsh was terrified of what would happen if Alex managed to get to him... And then..."
"And then?" Shiela was hanging on every word, far as Juan could tell.
"And then... he hatched up a plan. Alex made plenty of allies, sure. But Yursarsh was the God of Gods, a title nobody could take until he was as good as gone. All he had to do was promise one of his allies power, money, and fame, and they sold Alex and his friends out in no time at all. The group tried everything they could to keep themselves safe, but most perished along the way. One by one, Alex watched them fall, until only he was left. He didn't want their deaths to be wasted, so he challenged Yursarsh himself, ready to take him down with Excalibur. He got his wish to fight him alone, fair and square...
Yursarsh gobbled him up. All that remained of him was Excalibur, broken in half like a toothpick."
The man could see Shiela's face change, motes of color around her, rapidly changing as she didn't know how to feel about this twist. "My thoughts exactly," he answered her unspoken confusion. "Its what threw Levia into complete and utter dispair. Nobody could seal him up anymore, so he ran rampant again. Didn't go gobbling people up, oh no. He learned that through his powers, he could corrupt even the most loyal and best of people. Everybody has an ego, pride. Stroke it enough, and thinking right is thrown right out the window. That's how he has an iron grip on Levia today. Sure, he might have made technology to speed things up for the better, but it doesn't change the fact that even if a hero were to arise, he'd squash him like a bug just through influencing their thoughts."
A bump was heard as the boat parked itself by a dock. The trio could hear the sounds of people talking, yelling, bickering beyond a cavern entrance. They got off the boat and watched it row off again, without a care in the world. Shiela was silent and shivering. Afraid. "There's no hope, then?" she asked quietly, looking Juan right in the face. "Its over?"
"That's what most people believe," he answered. "Prophets don't bother announcing any good news. They get more money from spewing doom and gloom anyway. All they think they can do is prevent things from getting worse, because it'll never get better."
"You believe it too, don't you?"
Juan blinked before breaking into a smile. "I'm not 'most people', Shiela. Especially not with my empathy and unique way of using magic. My friend and my boss aren't like them, either. Most people think we're out of luck and there's no use fighting fate. We think that's stupid and fight against it. Yursarsh isn't all-seeing, after all. We're just biding our time until we can find just the heroes we need and take him and his minions out by the storm. Maybe repair Excalibur too, while we're at it. And it all starts...with you."
The two stared at each other before Shiela took a step back, eyes wide. "M-me? Starting with me? But I'm just a princess!"
"A princess who was gonna be part of a bad prophecy if I just left you there. Can't just sit around waiting for things to happen. Take the bull by the horns! Take control of your own fate. Who knows? Maybe you'll end up like Alex!"
The man almost regretted saying that. Almost. It was funny to see Shiela bounce up and down and shake as if she were about to explode in excitement. She didn't say a word; she just took Juan by the hand and headed towards the sounds, eager to talk to the "Queen" Juan was talking about.
In that moment, Juan knew that she would be one of their tickets out of their mess.
He turned his head towards little Shiela, shivering and desperately trying to keep the stink out of her nose. White wisps surrounded her, enveloping her. Juan wasn't sure whether to comfort her through holding her hand or talking to her. Taking her to the Netherworld might have confirmed the idea that he was a God of Death.
With no other choice, he looked Shiela in the eyes and said, "I know this is scary. You really are in the Netherworld, just like how they talk about in the storybooks."
"Then you lied," Shiela replied, turning away. "You're a big, fat liar."
"You're still alive and I intend on keeping it that way, though. A God of Death would just rip your soul out and be done with it."
"But you didn't tell me you were taking me here!"
"Had no time to. Besides, if I told you that, you'd either brush it off like a joke or be too scared to come along."
"But now I'm gonna be-"
"-taken to be judged and sent to hell or something?" Shiela glared at him as he chuckled. "Oh, no. I'm just taking you to a different part of the Netherworld. The queen herself would like to see you. All part of a plan, and none of it involves you coming to harm." Still glaring, was she? At least the wisps around her died down. Now to deal with her fear once and for all. "I pinky promise that nothing bad's gonna happen to you, okay? And if I break it, toss me into the River Lethe or something."
Juan held out his pinky for her, taking his sweet time. Shiela thought about it for a little bit before wrapping her tiny pinky around his. "Promise!" she said cheerfully, smiling so wide, it was a wonder that she was scared to begin with. It didn't last too long, as she held her nose to keep out the foul smell. "Does it stink like this everywhere here?" she asked.
"I'd be worried if it did," Juan replied. He dug into his pockets for two gold pieces, then stood by the river and waved. He could feel a pang of excitement as a boat seemingly rowed itself over to the shore, nobody in sight. "Guess Charon's taking a break," he said with a shrug before getting in, leaving his two gold at the bottom before helping Jasper and Shiela inside. With all guests accounted for, the boat rowed down the river, leaving Juan to relax and stretch.
Juan was starting to relax when Shiela poked at him and frowned. "Its kinda boring," she said, crossing her arms and puffing up her little cheeks. "Can you tell me a story? Mama used to tell me stories aaaall the time!"
Uh oh. He had to compete with mom? "I can't promise the story I tell will have a happy ending-"
"STORYTIME!" Did Shiela just ignore everything aside from "story"? Juan hoped she didn't, but her smile and all her clapping pointed otherwise.
"Guess its time to get on with it," he said to himself before taking a deep breath. "Long, long ago, there were seven gods: Yursarsh, God of Gods... Yuran, God of Light.... Ursula, Goddess of Darkness.. Axanon and Eriel, God of Fire and Goddess of Water... and Zephyr and Terra, God of Wind and Goddess of Earth. They all came from the Elder God Bauriel, who had died and left the job of making a whole new universe to them. They all worked together to do so, and that's how our planet came to be.
Yursarsh led his siblings, as his dad trusted him to take care of the world they brought. He was a bit rash sometimes and a giant glutton, but nothing was bigger than his curiosity. He liked learning about the world and seeing what happens. He paid quite a few visits to Ursula's library up in Heaven. The siblings knew that they couldn't afford to lose him, so they cast a spell to make him impervious to attacks by other gods, in case they became greedy for power.
Didn't work out too well, though, as he found out about one of Ursula's favorite book. It's said that anyone aside from her who read it would be driven insane from how much information they soak in about the past, present, and future."
Shiela stared. "Wow, that's a lot of information! But its Yursarsh, right? He can take it!"
A sigh dampened her smile in an instant. "Not even he can get away with reading it with his mind intact," Juan said bluntly. "And of course, when Ursula told him not to, he did it anyway. He went rampant and, well... It's said that he transformed into a giant shark and started devouring Heaven like cotton candy. None of the greater or lesser gods could do anything about him, so they banished him to the world below. And like a big baby that lost a game, he went like a spoilsport and started devouring the continents below.
The gods knew they couldn't do anything directly, so they tried to help the mortals below to combat him. Unfortunately, before he was sealed away, he devoured all the continents aside from Levia. Not sure if it was because the gods couldn't get to the continents in time or if they did, but the heroes did a bad job at stopping him. That'll probably be lost to history...
Anyway, he was sealed here, as our heroes were pretty old. Back problems, hip problems, the works. Since they didn't have the power to stop him, they sealed him away and hoped that by the time the seal broke, an actual party of heroes would be ready to stop him and his minions."
"And there was, right?!" Shiela asked, almost bouncing in her seat. Jasper wasn't too pleased by all the boat rocking, whimpering as water splashed in.
Juan thought for a moment as he sent the water back into the river using his magic. Once he spoke again, even Shiela could tell he was disappointed.
"There was, but... Well... Ugh, its complicated. Yeah, there were a party of heroes that rose up to the challenge once Yursarsh's minions began finding a way to break the seal and throw the continent into chaos while they were at it. Alexander Triden led them, a little knight from Sevalia, no older than 20. His companions were Xavier, a powerful mage who is probably one of those old heroes' great-great-great-great-great...something something grandson, Sarah, a powerful cleric with an equally powerful family, a barbarianess named Garnet, an orator named...Well, in the books, they call her Stel-Stel. I have no clue why... Fanboys? Oh, and there was a bard named Chuck, too! They all worked together to try to stop the chaos wrought by the minions, with mighty Excalibur by their side. Sure, the seal got broken, but even Yursarsh was terrified of what would happen if Alex managed to get to him... And then..."
"And then?" Shiela was hanging on every word, far as Juan could tell.
"And then... he hatched up a plan. Alex made plenty of allies, sure. But Yursarsh was the God of Gods, a title nobody could take until he was as good as gone. All he had to do was promise one of his allies power, money, and fame, and they sold Alex and his friends out in no time at all. The group tried everything they could to keep themselves safe, but most perished along the way. One by one, Alex watched them fall, until only he was left. He didn't want their deaths to be wasted, so he challenged Yursarsh himself, ready to take him down with Excalibur. He got his wish to fight him alone, fair and square...
Yursarsh gobbled him up. All that remained of him was Excalibur, broken in half like a toothpick."
The man could see Shiela's face change, motes of color around her, rapidly changing as she didn't know how to feel about this twist. "My thoughts exactly," he answered her unspoken confusion. "Its what threw Levia into complete and utter dispair. Nobody could seal him up anymore, so he ran rampant again. Didn't go gobbling people up, oh no. He learned that through his powers, he could corrupt even the most loyal and best of people. Everybody has an ego, pride. Stroke it enough, and thinking right is thrown right out the window. That's how he has an iron grip on Levia today. Sure, he might have made technology to speed things up for the better, but it doesn't change the fact that even if a hero were to arise, he'd squash him like a bug just through influencing their thoughts."
A bump was heard as the boat parked itself by a dock. The trio could hear the sounds of people talking, yelling, bickering beyond a cavern entrance. They got off the boat and watched it row off again, without a care in the world. Shiela was silent and shivering. Afraid. "There's no hope, then?" she asked quietly, looking Juan right in the face. "Its over?"
"That's what most people believe," he answered. "Prophets don't bother announcing any good news. They get more money from spewing doom and gloom anyway. All they think they can do is prevent things from getting worse, because it'll never get better."
"You believe it too, don't you?"
Juan blinked before breaking into a smile. "I'm not 'most people', Shiela. Especially not with my empathy and unique way of using magic. My friend and my boss aren't like them, either. Most people think we're out of luck and there's no use fighting fate. We think that's stupid and fight against it. Yursarsh isn't all-seeing, after all. We're just biding our time until we can find just the heroes we need and take him and his minions out by the storm. Maybe repair Excalibur too, while we're at it. And it all starts...with you."
The two stared at each other before Shiela took a step back, eyes wide. "M-me? Starting with me? But I'm just a princess!"
"A princess who was gonna be part of a bad prophecy if I just left you there. Can't just sit around waiting for things to happen. Take the bull by the horns! Take control of your own fate. Who knows? Maybe you'll end up like Alex!"
The man almost regretted saying that. Almost. It was funny to see Shiela bounce up and down and shake as if she were about to explode in excitement. She didn't say a word; she just took Juan by the hand and headed towards the sounds, eager to talk to the "Queen" Juan was talking about.
In that moment, Juan knew that she would be one of their tickets out of their mess.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)