Wednesday, January 27, 2021

Thief in the Night

 "You damned thief!"


He could hear the thunk, thonk, thunk of a man on a mission, chasing after him. It was a surprise, honestly: who knew an onion man with such stubby legs could keep up with him as he sprinted around town with cheetah legs? More likely, the damned Lilty was stupid determined, his feathery, armored buddy reluctantly Hasting him just so he could catch up.


"Get back here, you!" the Lilty shouted over the din of bars and inns still open at this late an hour. "I'm not lettin' you get away with this again!"


The thief rolled his eyes and scanned the streets as he ran straight across on all fours, slowing down just to adjust the Oni mask he was wearing, making sure it wouldn't slip off. They were getting close to one of the rivers that ran underneath the city. If he can just get there without the Lilty getting too close, then maybe he could make another escape. The issue was, Haste was a powerful spell, and this onion was powered by the fury of a merchant scorned. Adrenaline, as far as he's read, allowed for incredible feats, including a second wind that could allow the merchant to catch him. Either that, or get too close to him and get a glimpse of his true face to post all over Agama's magicrystal boards, to start a bounty proper.


He had to make absolutely sure to slow him down for this trick, or he was screwed, one way or another.


But what if he didn't need to take to the rivers right away? There were plenty of alleyways about in the city. Plenty of trash cans to throw at the merchant to slow him down, too. Then again, that onion was stubborn and would sooner send trash flying all around the city before it could stop his chase. So that was out. The thief's face twisted in thought. There could be use for the alleyways, but what would keep the Lilty from catching up? He racked his brain for ideas: transform into a beetle? No, he'd sooner get stomped on accident. A bird? That'd be suspicious at this time of night, whether it was a finch or an owl. And even then, how long could he maintain said forms after running with cheetah legs for so long? 


Wait. There was a creature whose skin could change color, right? Maybe-


A spear flew towards him, the thief barely able to dodge it in time as the merchant boomed, "I almost have you now, you rat!"


No time to think. The thief bolted into the closest alleyway he could find before pressing himself against the wall. The cheetah legs shifted back into more humanoid legs and arms, his cheetah tail poofing into a rather bushy brown raccoon tail as his skin shifted into something slimy,  quickly tossing away his mask before his entire body blended in with the adobe walls. He held his breath, even as his heart threatened to burst out as the Lilty turned in and ran right past him. 


"I swear, when I get my hands on you, I'll-" was all he heard before the onion was out of sight.


Slowly, his skin shifted back to how it was: dark, sunkissed, and definitely not slimy.  He hid behind a trash can and peered above it, looking all the world like a burglar with his racoonish face. His raccoon ears twitched, listening for any sign of thumping and clanking from what little armor that onion managed to don. When he could hear none, he took a deep breath, reaching for a pouch on his side and pulling out a leaf, placing it gently on his head as the vision of a frog filled his mind. 


POOF. With a thought and a little bit of magic, he was now a frog, hopping away from the scene and into the closest river, letting the currents take him where they may.



-------------------------


Three minutes later, the tanuki man clawed himself out of the river, soaking wet from head to toe. He scampered under a bridge to wring his tail out, grumbling all the while.


"That onion really knows how to run when money's on the line," he said as he shook himself like a just-bathed dog. "Might need to cool it with the heists before he wisens up and brings pals over to trap me. But in the meantime..."


He took out a plain brown pouch and opened it up, grabbing a few things from out there: an extremely tiny painting, jade necklaces and strings of pearls that looked more like they belonged on dolls more than anything, and several gold and silver rings. There were specks of yellow dust on the painting and necklaces,  which he was careful to blow away on one item at a time. As the dust was removed, the items slowly grew in size, until the painting was just about as tall as he was, and the necklaces were just the right side for any humanoid to wear. 


It was the painting that got his attention the most, the tanuki squinting at it until his eyes hurt. He ignored the bright colors of an angel descending upon a dark, gloomy populace, running his fingers down the  painting until he found a signature: Von Dulak. He dug into his pouch again, pulling out a smartphone and scouring the net until a smile cracked onto his face.


"This guy's works are famous, huh?" he says to himself as he looks at the collections of paintings said artist made, though all of them seemed to have some connection to a savior protecting the populace or rescuing something or another. "Last work of his auctioned off for big bucks. Maybe not millions, but a 100k for a painting? Could live nicely off that." He glanced over to the painting again and squinted. "If it's not fake," he added with a huff. "Would be just in line with the Old Guard to pay big money for a fake.


Could take it to get appraised somewhere, make sure its real, but if that onion's got ties to those guys, one glance at it and they'll be ready to hang me at the gallows." His eyes narrowed, brow arched in thought. "I could disguise myself as him, but it wouldn't last long. Can't say I can pay for a proxy, especially if they're already in his pocket. Could cover my face and change my tail while I wear something appropriate, but that might draw a little suspicion too, and it's not like I have a closet in my Bag of Holding."


He pondered and pondered under the bridge until he heard the baying of a mule from right above him, another voice chiming in.


"Oh, come on, Marigold! Stop your complaining, it's not like you're about to stay at a one-star Motel! It's The Accidental Hero, not Ol' John's Pubbery!"


That voice... there was nothing else like it. It was a voice he heard often while skulking about the marketplace in the morning, booming about honey and coffee. 


Quickly, he grabbed another pouch on his belt, sprinkling dust on the painting to shrink it down, then shoved the painting and jewelry back into the bag of holding and tied it to his belt before shifting into a hummingbird, zipping up as he watched Marigold snort and Sumalee roll her eyes. 


Jackpot.


He zipped down to her and said, "Psst, Suma! Suma, it's me-"


Marigold glared at him, her pixie handler sharing her suspicion. "Excuse me, do I actually know you? Because you're definitely not one of my flock!"


"Oh for- who else can be a talking hummingbird other than a certain someone?"


"Druids," came the blunt reply.


Shit. She was right. With a groan, he shifted to his true tanuki form and pounded on his chest. "Okay, you got me, but seriously, druids? At this hour?"


Sumalee's eyes widened with surprise before she said, "Boss?" At that last quip, though, she said, "Well, someone doesn't know about the Circle of the Moon, huh? Maybe you should brush up on that before you say stupid things like that."


"Sure, fine, but first, let me just hide in here!" 


"Wait, wha-" 


"Boss" leaped into the cart, Marigold protesting before the tanuki shushed her. Sumalee fumed, flying on over to him and glaring at him with the intensity of a Moonbeam.


"Okay, 'Boss', what's the big deal?! You can't just hide in my cart whenever you want! You want people to think I'm smuggling Tanukis or something?!?"


Boss rolled his eyes. "Yeah, like they wouldn't just slip out of your grip like a fish. Don't think our kind's really much on the map here anyway. But really, I need your help, and no, I don't need more pixie dust." He paused, thinking and looking in his other pouch, seeing how little yellow dust remained in there before he looked back at Sumalee and added, "Yet."


Sumalee crossed her arms and legs, her glare softening to displeasure more than anything. "Sounds like something big if you're hiding like this."


The pixie knew a little bit about him, or at least enough to trust him with pixie dust. He phrased his heists more like item recovery from ruins and all, and that any paintings or carvings would be difficult to carry over without dusting them and shrinking them to a more manageable size. He could tell her the truth of the matter, but did she really need to know? Then again, what kind of story would even fit for his situation? 'Oh, I just happened to find a painting before some other guy so he went to hunt me down!' Yeah, wasn't going to fly when most ruin explorers were cooperative. Maybe for the necklaces- no, they didn't have that freshly dug up scent or look to them, she'd find out too quickly. Fended off a burglar for a friend? May-


"I don't have all night, so spit it out, Boss!"


Damn it, if she would only let him think up of a story... No time. Again. Boss's tail and ears drooped, putting on his most apologetic look before he spoke.


"So I did a lil oopsie, trying to recover some items from a guy going to the village, aaand apparently, he saw me and was very determined to chase me down for something he stole!" he said with a dramatic sigh. "I just barely managed to escape his wrath with the goods, but I'm sure he'll be on the lookout for me. I just needed help appraising some items and making sure they're returned to where they belong, you know?"


He wasn't sure if Sumalee bought it or not, her face scrunching and staring him down. 


The facepalm told him everything, though.


"Uugh, no wonder Gil Wood was throwing such a fit and screaming about thieves in the night." Boss's face fell, realizing that of course Sumalee would know him: they were both merchants! "I'm going to take a reaaaally wild guess and say you stole some gemstones and rings and other expensive stuff off his caravan, too."


Fuck, she knew too much. With the jig up, Boss replied, "Yeeeeeeeaaaaaaaah, okay, you got me." The fur on his tail puffed out as he angrily added, "But I have my reasons for it, okay? Only the gaudy expensive stuff's good for the taking, not any of the food or things to survive or anything!'


Sumalee sat beside him and looked up, taking him off guard with a look of concern. "Does it have anything to do with your home? Because I've noticed its always a caravan going to the tanuki village."


A fire burned in his heart as he almost said, Well, they deserve it. He bit his tongue just as the words were about to leave his mouth, flinching at the pain before he settled for, "Like I said, I have my reasons."


"Aaaand you're not going to tell me those reasons, are you?"


"No."


"Not even if I give you free pixie dust for a year?"


Sumalee fluttered her eyelids at him, but it was that deal that made him hesitate and think. But ultimately, he shook his head. "Sorry, but no."


"You're just making it harder for yourself- and for me, too- but guess reasons have as much power as a true name now, huh?" When Boss didn't reply, she shook her head and said, "Fine, I'll give you some help, but don't you dare mention me in any capacity. I don't need my reputation put on the line because I'm helping you out. Show me whatcha got, and I'll see what I can do."


It didn't take too long for him to show her the goods as Marigold trotted along the path. Sumalee fluttered from thing to thing, the rings catching her attention first, then the necklace. The painting was his biggest  concern, but here she was, taking out some monocle thing to look at rings like they were the true prize.


"Rings might fetch a few hundred dollars. Made of good material, most of them. Some have enchantments, but the only one I can distinguish is that one of them has an Invisibilty thingy on it. Sounds too good to be true, though, so I'll take it to Leanne to make sure its not cursed." Sumalee grabbed the strings of pearls and shook her head as she continued, "The pearls? Fake as fuck. Pearl oysters can't survive in these rivers, and they take too much time and effort to make even cultured pearls. They're impressive looking fakes, like- here, take it and put it on your tooth for a sec. Feel it."


Boss wasn't entirely enthused by putting pearls in his mouth, but he did as he was told. "Feels pretty smooth," he commented as he spat it back out and wiped his mouth. "That's what pearls should feel like, right?"


"Not at all, Bossy boy!" Sumalee puffed up her chest with pride as she took the pearls away. "Can't see it with the naked eye, but real pearls are grainy when you look at 'em with a good magnifier! Fake ones? They're more rugged, more eggshell-lookin'. You can feel the graininess with your teeth with real ones, too! So whatcha got there are some pretty expensive fakes. And as for the jade, someone must have paid out the wazoo for that, because that's as real as it can get."


As much as he'd love to rejoice at the fact that something here is real besides rings, Boss couldn't help but glance back at the painting. "Aaand what about this?" he asked, turning back to Sumalee. "This isn't a fake, is it?"


Suma looked over at the painting, a deep frown forming on her face before she turned back to him. "Ain't my specialty, Boss. I could take it to someone who might have a clue, but..."


"But someone might have a connection with Gil and put two and two together," Boss finished with a frown, taking a pinch of pixie dust to shrink it down and shove it back into his bag. "You said to leave your name out of this, so I'll just see if some random rich guy wants big bucks for it, fake or not." 


As they rounded the corner and the duo could see the brightly lit sign of The Accidental Hero, Boss grabbed the rest of his haul back into his bag, legs shifting to that of a kangaroo's and ready to hop out before Sumalee said, "Wait!"


He turned towards her and saw the concern on her face. "Be careful out there, Boss. Kobbers'll be here soon, if they aren't already here. And whether you like it or not, keepin' secrets around 'em- whether it be about your true name or your intentions with all your thievery- will only make it harder for you, especially if Gil manages to get their attention to get ya."


His ears twitched at the mention of Kobbers, a pang of fear seizing his heart for a moment before he hopped off the cart into the darkness, hiding in the alleyways as his mind simmered with thoughts.

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