The Need for Speed, Part 1

 What a mess.

 Stan woke up on the same lumpy bed, to see all his clothes littered about and posters of famous reploids and humans plastered over the walls, as well as a few rock band posters scattered about. With a yawn, he rolled out and drowsily put on a shirt and at least some pajama pants before going into his bathroom, which was as disorganized and messy as his normal room. He made sure to tame his wild, long, blonde hair and put his red headband on. Even after taming it, though, his eyes were hidden behind that mane, and he had no choice but to leave it like that. Would have been more of a pain to actually tame it.

After doing his daily routine of brushing teeth, showering, and watching some boring news segment on TV, he stumbled around the base until he reached the Command Room, slumping into a seat in front of the main computer and laying his head down on the keyboard.

"So tired," the blonde groaned, taking a moment to look out the window and immediately regretting it when the sun shined in his eyes. "Uuuugh, I hate waking up this early. I feel like a log."

There was no response, as he expected. Sasha and Tina usually slept in, so it was his job to wake up early and check to see if there was any communication from other bases or some other important thing. He hated it, but he remembered Sasha being up late at night, bags under her eyes as she watched reruns of detective shows in the break room. That girl was a night owl, for sure. Tina was just a kid and needed as much rest as possible, so he didn't bother her much.


So here he was, checking out the computer, seeing no new mail or communications, and promptly putting his head on the keyboard again. Nothing as usual. Why does he even bother? Nobody even makes breakfast anymore. God, he could use a pancake, but ovens spontaneously combust if he ever gets near one-

Oh? Someone is cooking pancakes? Sniff, sniff.

Definitely pancakes, Stan thought, drooling a little at the thought of someone actually making pancakes. He didn't have them in so long, it was like a dream... A really crazy dream. Oh man, that smell is getting stronger. And is that maple syrup? Oooh, someone's going all out!

Stan couldn't stand it anymore. He got up and followed his nose to the scent. And there it was, a tower of pancakes on four different plates, all topped with syrup and a bit of butter. Oh, come to papa, you delicious little stacks, you-

"And now to wait for everyone else! Maaaan, I haven't had pancakes in forever!"

Stan turned towards the source of the voice and saw Pisces, wearing an apron and now holding a fork and knife, taking a seat in front of one  stack of pancakes. "You made these?!" he asked, eyes wide open and staring right at the reploid. "Usually reploids don't make food, nevermind eat them! No taste buds or need for it!"

Pisces smiled and replied, "Well, I figured that you guys would need some yummy in your tummies, and one of the few things I'm good at is cooking a meal, so I thought, 'Pancakes!' And yeah, it's normal for reploids to have no taste buds, buuuut my creator wanted to make me and any other reploid she made as humanlike as possible! Soooo we got some sensors that act like taste buds, and systems that can break down food into energy we can use and all that jaaaaazz. Now sit down and let's wait for Sasha and Tina, we gotta have this meal together to make it extra awesome!"

"Yooo, fish boy, not sure if you got the memo, but Sasha and Tina are like, never up at this time. Serious. They don't even wake up 'til 9 at earliest! So those pancakes are gonna get cold as hell before they get here."

 The fish reploid frowned and whined, "Aaaw, can't you just wake them up? I made it with an extra helping of love and appreciation!"

 "What does appreciation even taste like?"

 "Oh, like any other thing: like joy, filled with buttery goodness and so much syrup, it would give a human a big helping of diabetes."

 Stan cringed, making an odd, disgusted noise.

 "Guessing you don't want to try it?"

 "If that's what appreciation tastes like, no!"

 "Suit yourself.

 Pisces daintily cut himself a large piece of the stack before bowing his head and closing his eyes in some prayer, then stuffed the whole piece into his mouth, syrup splattering all over his lips and chin. Stan stared, first out of shock, then out of amusement, and then because goddamn it, maybe he should just eat the things. Stan sat down in front of another stack and started to eat, making sure not to have it all in a stack when he cut into them, although he did eat much, much faster than Pisces did.

"So," Stan said with his mouth full of buttery goodness, "You like racing?"

"Mrph hrmf!" came the muffled reply.

"Good, because nobody seems to be in the mood for that type of stuff around here! I get bored in the mornings, so what I usually do is- get this- I take a Ride Chaser out and do a few laps around the forest. I try going faster and faster each time to try to break my record, but it's gotten boring lately. Especially since none of the girls are interested in doing it with me." Stan put his feet up on the table and leaned back in his chair, plate in one hand and fork in another. "So maybe you and I should go out and see who's the King of Fast, huh?"

The reploid took a moment to actually swallow his food this time before speaking. "Oh, is that a challenge? Well, I'll have you know that I know my way around a Ride Chaser! Speeding through the sea, feeling the rush of water against my fins, maybe crashing into an ancient pillar or two-"

"But it's been a long time since you've ridden one, huh?" Stan topped off three pancakes while Pisces was speaking, starting on his fourth as he began to smirk. "Don't worry, I'll go easy on you the first few go-arounds. But once you're up to speed, no more holding back, fish boy!"

Another giant stack piece, cut down and devoured.

"Oh, you won't need to hold back," Pisces retorted with a smirk of his own. "Riding a Ride Chaser is like riding a bicycle: you never forget once you learn it!" He thought for a moment, putting a finger on his syrup, stained chin, before adding with a nervous chuckle, "Well, after you nearly wreck the thing a few times."

"Yeah, I did that the first few times. Cost us a fortune. And now, I'm a speed demon!"

"And I'm Megaman X, savior of human and reploidkind," the fish reploid teased.

Stan stood up, grinning and putting his fists together as he called out, "You wanna go, punk? Because I'll take you on!"

Pisces prayed a little more, or at least it looked like it, before he took the last stack piece and stuffed it in his mouth, taking out a napkin and wiping his lips daintily as he chewed. Then he stood up, grinning right back at him. "You're on."

"Then let's go, then! Let me show you where we keep the Ride Chasers and all that glorious shit. The deets can wait until we get to the forest! And once I'm there, oh, your ass is grass!"