A Very Merry Kishmas, Part 3

 “Let’s find a reindeer!” they said. “It’s not like you’re trying to find Waldo or anything!” they said.

That’s what Kisha thought, too, up until the search actually began. It may be a wild animal, but it was a wild animal in a sea of people and cars, in a city that saw kaiju-sized monstrosities roam its streets and had its fair share of superheroes and psychics lurking in the nooks and crannies. It wasn’t as easy as going to Times Square and calling out the damn thing’s name. Not that it could even hear anything among the crowd of tourists harassed into buying some guy’s bootleg DVDs.

Holding out pictures of a reindeer and asking if they saw one in an attempt to spark a conversation about it weren’t going very well. Neither was Edward’s plan to check under holiday hotspots, as the crew was pushed back so that a family could take a photo under the giant Christmas Tree. Food cart owners shook their heads at the mention of reindeer, some of them rolling their eyes and asking, “Ey, ya gonna buy somethin’ or what?” Kisha would have throttled them, but Edward thanked them for their time and pulled out a wad of dollars, walking away with a big bag of food.

To make matters worse, people oggled at Santa whenever she happened to be in the same area as a Mall Santa, cheerfully shouting things out like, “Let’s do our best this year!” and “Try not to eat too many cookies this time!” The Mall Santas were as confused as everyone else, but at least made a heartfelt attempt to nod and smile at their fellow Santa Cosplayer. Kisha enjoyed it at first, up until her bunny pal actually waited in lines for Santa. Edward was with her, patting her on the head and saying, “Now, now, Monica, be patient! Have to be patient, or you might end up on the Naughty list!”

Kisha decided to bury that building feeling of secondhand embarrassment by wandering off into a bookstore, coming face to face with more reindeer plushes than she could imagine. All of them, with beady little eyes, looking into her soul. Pleading with her. Adopt them, they’re so cold… so lonely…

After two hours of searching malls and Times Square and coming out with plush reindeers, bootlegs, and more photos of Bunny!Santa hanging out with Mall!Santa than anyone ever asked for, Kisha sat on a bench, angrily shoving honey-roasted peanuts in her mouth, Santa pulling a pretzel out of the bag while Edward ate half of his own.

“Stupid reindeer shoulda been easier to find than this,” she grumbled inbetween bites, glaring daggers at pigeons that got too close. “Didn’t see him around kids or holiday shit or anything! Hell, there was a Santa convergence and he didn’t even show up!”

Edward patted Kisha on the back as she grumped, reassuring her with a, “There, there. We’ll find him eventually! We did just look around just one part of a big city!”

A loud groan escaped her lips as Kisha slumped back and sagged. “One down, a million more to go. We won’t be able to find him til Christmas if we’re busy searching for his dumb deer ass on foot.” She glanced over at Santa, the bunny girl staring back in confusion until she asked, “Hey, you sense your deer anywhere? Anything to narrow it down?”

Santa’s ears twitched before she closed her eyes, still nibbling on her pretzel before her ears twitched and adjusted themselves like TV antennae. “Mmmm, he’s closer, but I can’t pinpoint where,” she said with a frown once she opened her eyes, ears flopping back down on her face. “Seems like we’re in the right area, though. We just need to find the right spot, that’s all!”

Edward took out his phone, hastily texting as he said, “Good to know~! Jaz’ll appreciate the info. No driving all the way to Queens or taking the subway everywhere!”

“Yeah, but the place is still huge, Ed,” Kisha pointed out, wiping down her hands with a napkin and resting her head on the bench as she stared into the sky. “We already hit up the major holiday hotspots and, lets face it, if there was reindeer in the middle of Central Park, someone would have made a big fuss about it by now. We’d see like five thousand photos of the damn thing in the zoo and a headline.”

She sighed, pulling out her phone,ready to google up how to summon a magical reindeer when, from the corner of her eye, she saw a shadow. She looked back, a man quickly hiding behind a tree when she spotted him. The priestess turned back around and pretended not to notice him,  sitting up straight using the selfie function on her phone to try to get a better look as she pretended to prepare for pictures. Bingo: guy came out, wearing all black, bunny ears twitching, eyes locked onto Santa.

Edward raised an eyebrow as she ran her fingers through her hair while glaring at this mysterious photobomber. “Getting ready to captivate a crowd, hun?” he asked, eyes trailing from her face over to the weird man in black. “Or just…?”

“Eeh, just making sure my hair’s fine,” Kisha replied, putting away her phone and pulling out her wallet. She scanned the area, spotting a simple hot dog cart nearby before she turned to Santa. “Hey, Santa, could ya do me a favor?” The bunny girl turned to her just as she shoved some dollar bills in her hands. “Get me a hot dog, will ya? Load it up with extra everything, while you’re at it!”

“Make it two, actually!” Edward piped in, handing some more money to the confused bun with a grin. “Just a ketchup-mustard topping on mine, if you would!”

Santa glanced between the two of them, breaking into a small sweat as she asked, “O-okay, but didn’t you guys JUST eat?” When the two of them just grinned at her, the bun nodded and rushed off to get those hot dogs, Kisha sighing in relief and looking back at that man in black. Eyes were still set on Santa, bringing out some phone and typing something before looking back at the bunny girl.

Edward leaned in, grin exchanged for a serious, furrowed brow as he whispered, “Something up, Kish?”

“Fucker might be one of those guys hunting down Santa,” Kisha whispered back, making sure that the culprit wasn’t looking in her direction. “Who the hell wears getup like that in public?”

“Could be someone who really likes the Men in Black. Or a LARPer.”

A blank stare was Kisha’s gift to Edward for that one. “Uh, sure, I’m going to fucking LARP in public and pretend I’m hunting down aliens. Yeah, no, Ed.”

As the man in black moved towards Santa, Edward glared at him for a moment before he looked back at Kisha… or rather, the half-eaten bag of peanuts. “Mind if I have those?” Kisha stared at him for a moment before reluctantly relinquishing them to him. He grinned as he opened them slightly… then hurled the whole package at the man’s feet, nuts spilling onto the ground.

Confusion twisted the bunny man’s features for a split second before a cloud of pigeons descended on him, pecking at him as they greedily searched for food. He screamed, waving his arms to try to chase them away, but they were persistent, refusing to give up once something was in their sights. Never had Kisha been gladder that the pigeons were on their side as she cast a spell on herself, time around her speeding up as she dashed past him and grabbing Santa just as she finished putting toppings on those hot dogs, the bunny girl squeaking as she was whisked away.

“W-wait, what’s going on?!” she asked, nearly dropping a hot dog in surprise.

Edward caught up just in time for both him and Kisha to point out that angry rabbit guy, swearing up a storm as he fought pigeons with danmaku. “THAT’S going on,” they said in unison, Santa’s eyes widening when the birds were put down, the blasts homing in on them instead.

“Ed, text Jaz! Fucker’s not gonna leave us alone now that we ruined his day!” Kisha yelled, her friend pulling up his phone and texting as fast as his fingers would allow. When a blast grazed her shoulder, she raised up a hand and fired a light blast of her own, right in his eyes. Just enough light to bring him to his knees, man swearing as he jammed his hands in his pockets, fumbling and dropping his phone as he scrambled to grab it.

Santa sniffled, eyes watering as she said, “I-I thought we were safe! I’m so sorry! I’m sorry I dragged you into this!”

Edward just shrugged, scooping up his hot dog and grinning mischievously. “Oh, don’t worry, we go through these sorta things all the time! Livens up the place, brings a little excitement to an otherwise boring day!”

“Yeah, things are about to get real exciting with a bunch of rabbit mobsters on our asses.” In spite of how grumpy Kisha sounded, excitement built up in her heart. Maybe she’d get to deck a few dozen assholes after all! “Better get that Reindeer Detector bullshit up and running because this is gonna be a wild ride!”

Santa opened her mouth to retort, but once she saw the mobster calling for backup in the distance, she closed her eyes and let the Manhattan duo take the lead, concentrating on locating that general Christmas-y aura Rein usually emitted. Hard to do that when everybody’s yelling and shouting at Kisha for pushing her way through crowds.

Now would be a great time to wish for a miracle, she thought… but miracles don’t come that easy.